Overcoming Obstacles With God

Scriptures: 1 John 1:9, Revelation 3:20, Romans 6:23

Taking that First Step through the Door

What was your first time going to church like? Do you remember the person standing at the pulpit? What was your initial reaction to the sermon?

Walking up the steps of the old Hispanic church building with the faded stucco, I could smell the tamales and pupusas. I could hear the music, the sounds of Spanish-speaking voices around me—my culture, mi raza, my people. There was little to no air conditioning past the front doors, creating a hot, sticky room. But that didn’t faze these people – they were survivors. 

“For if while we were enemies, we were reconciled to God by the death of His Son, how much more, being reconciled, shall we be saved by His life.” – Romans 5:10, MEV

People knew I was a gang member just by the way I dressed. I recognized the man on stage giving his testimony as a former rival gang member. He was preaching, and as he spoke, he was getting louder, and looking right at me. 

“Praise the Lord! For it is good to sing praises unto our God; for it is pleasant, and a song of praise is fitting.” – Psalm 147:1, MEV

There were no smog machines and no concert lights. This was an old, humble church, but man, they sang that song like they meant it. Everyone in that room had their hands raised. Some people were clapping; others were crying. There was such innocence and a lack of judgment from everyone. The room had such peace and love I didn’t recognize. I didn’t know how to respond to it. A tear fell from my eye and then another and another. At the same time, I was still holding tight to my gun. I had been taught never to let my guard down.

Scriptures: Proverbs 3:5-6, Philippians 4:13, James 1:12

Obstacle #1: Yourself

Have you ever felt like you were standing in your own way? Think about a time when you rejected someone or something for whatever reason. Do you regret it?

All of a sudden, the man on stage began to talk about Jesus in a way I had never heard Him spoken of before. He said, “I’m going to get off the stage.” As he stepped down from the platform, he started walking toward me. The closer he got, the tighter I held my gun. As he came closer to my face, he spoke directly to me, as if he had forgotten other people were in the room. 

“He who believes in the Son has eternal life. He who does not believe the Son shall not see life, but the wrath of God remains on him.” – John 3:36, MEV

He was looking at me, and it was as if he could see beyond my Locs. He said, “So what are you going to do? Are you going to give your life to Him? Or are you going to walk out of this building and maybe run into a bullet with your name on it? Are you going to leave this building knowing you heard the gospel, that you heard hope for the first time in your life, and just walk away?” 

“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish, but have eternal life.” – John 3:16, MEV

He invited me to go to the front of the church and receive prayer. He challenged me to be vulnerable in a way I had never needed to be. I thought, “Man, I’m not a punk. I don’t punk out from nobody.” He started walking back toward the platform, then stopped and turned around. I grabbed my gun, thinking, “This guy’s about to shoot me.” Instead, he looked at me and said, “You know, He loves you. He died for you on the cross. He wants to make things right with you.” 

Those words would change my life.

Scriptures: Isaiah 43:18-19, Philippians 3:13-14, 2 Corinthians 5:17

Obstacle #2: Your Past

What physical or emotional scars from the past are you carrying with you? Are you allowing them to define you and your future?

As a gangster, there were only three destinations: a grave, a hospital room, or a prison cell. We called it, “the trinity of life.” This was our destiny. Bound by honor, we lived to die and died to live for our barrio, our neighborhood, and our people. It’s all we had. It’s all we knew, and it was all we had left. It was our familia. The only thing that united us was our brokenness. 

“And you were dead in your trespasses and sins, in which you formerly walked according to the age of this world and according to the prince of the power of the air, the spirit who now works in the sons of disobedience, among them we all also once lived in the lusts of our flesh, doing the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and we were by nature children of wrath, even as the rest.” – Ephesians 2:1-3, MEV

In the gangs, I was a living dead man. In my mind, I was already dead. It was only a matter of time. Death was always near. From getting out of my homie’s car to waking up and going out of my house to catch the bus to school, death was at my door. I could smell it; I could feel it. I could sense it. Death was always near, and my time was running out. 

Without God as our guide, we are like lost sheep, who follow the herd even to our deaths. However, God is the great shepherd—the one who leaves the 99 for the 1—and leads us to everlasting life with Him.

I should have been dead a long time ago. At the same time, I knew something special was going on. Others saw it, too—how God miraculously protected me in situations where death was certain. Yet I still couldn’t believe it. I had seen too much violence and sorrow. I often wondered how a just God allows bad things to happen to good people. This question created so much anger and hate inside me. It was a constant battle in my head—good versus evil, life versus death. Yeah, death was stalking me, but life was chasing me as well.

Scriptures: Luke 6:27, John 15:13, Leviticus 19:18

Obstacle #3: Your Hate

Hate consumes everyone and everything in its path. The solution?

When I was younger, my rage-fueled dad beat my mom nearly to death. After he beat her, I heard my dad tell my mom, “I don’t want them anymore.” Those were the last words I heard him speak before we escaped. Those words haunted and tortured me for years, to the point I said to myself, “When I grow up if I ever see him again, I’m going to kill him.” 

The solution to all-consuming hate is God’s love, which extinguishes the flames of destruction and floods your broken heart with divine healing.

If there was ever something that got my attention while growing up, it was love. That was something I wished I could have shared with my father, but my definition of love had been so corrupted by the way he had treated my mother, my sister, and me. Then, of course, it was further corrupted by what the street had taught me love was. There was a battle going on inside me between my past experiences and the love that one man showed by going to the cross to die for what the speaker called my “sin.” 

“For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, neither angels nor principalities nor powers, neither things present nor things to come, neither height nor depth nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” – Romans 8:35-39, MEV

When I heard the speaker at a small Hispanic church speak of Jesus’s sacrifice and love for me, I felt unconditional love for the first time, and I couldn’t hold in my emotions. I felt compassion and hope. This feeling was weird to me because love and compassion were the kryptonite of a street warrior. It was ingrained in me that having feelings was a sign of weakness that would be used against me. But I could not deny the peace I felt when there had been nothing but turmoil. As my grip on the guns relaxed, so did the hate that had held my heart. I didn’t need the guns to protect me anymore. Something about being loved made me feel protected.

Scriptures: Isaiah 50:7, Romans 10:11, 2 Corinthians 4:2

Obstacle #4: Your Shame

Shame is a powerful deterrent to growth. Can you think of a time when your shame stopped you from pursuing the Lord?

When I lived at the Dream Center, Pastor Tommy and Pastor Matthew had given me the responsibility of picking up their guests from the airport and driving them back. I had driven a lot of guests, but none as high-profile as Jim Bakker was at that time – the founder of the PTL Network, a pioneer of Christian television, and the one who was involved in a big scandal in the eighties and went to prison. His name and face had been on every news outlet and tabloid in the World. Of course, because of my background on the streets, I wasn’t aware of any of that. 

Jim Bakker was a man with a small frame, and at the airport, that frame was bent over with the heavy weight of shame. Like a scared little boy, he kept his head down staring at his feet, seemingly embarrassed and frightened for anyone to see him. Wearing a hat, he hoped no one would recognize him as we walked through the terminal. Unfortunately, people around did recognize him. They were gawking, pointing, and asking, “Hey, is that Jim Bakker? That looks like Jim Bakker.” That made me start to think, “Who is this guy?” 

“God can still use broken dreams with broken people.” – Evangelist Jim Bakker

Mr. Jim spoke to the ex-gangsters at the Dream Center. He had on a hat and was stumbling over his words. Finally, he said, “I just got to ask the crowd a question. How many people have been in prison?” It looked to me like about 80 percent of the room stood up. And Mr. Jim said, “This is my kind of place. I feel like I’m home. I’m one of you.” And the room erupted in cheers. At that moment, this man who was scared he would be spat upon and cursed out went from being shy and not looking up to being a bold and fiery preacher. Something just came over him as if a switch had been turned on. He began to preach a message I will never forget called “God Can Still Use Broken Dreams with Broken People.” 

“He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your judgment as the noonday. Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him; do not fret because of those who prosper in their way, because of those who make wicked schemes. Let go of anger, and forsake wrath; do not fret—it surely leads to evil deeds.” – Psalm 37:6-8, MEV

I asked him how he ended up getting a forty-five-year sentence. Mr. Jim said it all came down to various people who planned his destruction. He also told me a large federal agency had framed him by getting videos of his programs and editing them to make him say things he never said, which was one of the reasons he ended up getting accused and sentenced. Attorney Alan Dershowitz took on his appeals case and argued that the previous judge was prejudiced against him. As a result, Jim’s forty-five-year sentence was overturned, and he was released on parole after serving nearly five years. Jim said that in a later civil trial, he provided evidence of the videos the federal agency had altered and played them back unedited and in context. That time, he said, the jury ruled in his favor. The news did not report that as they did in the first trial. 

Mr. Jim explained, “The damage was already done. I lost my family, the ministry was stolen, my friends walked away, and my reputation was ruined in front of the world. I lost it all. But I never lost hope in Jesus. He never left me and never forsook me. I grew closer to Him, and the reason I am still here is because I learned to forgive myself and forgave all the people who hurt me and my family from my heart.” Then, Mr. Jim added, “Never give up, Mondo. Never give up on God. He never gives up on you. Stay humble. I had to learn the hard way. You don’t if you just walk in humility.”