When we lose a husband, we feel scared, lonely, and overwhelmed not only by the devastating pain and grief but also by the sudden life-altering change. This reading plan contains seven writings from seven different widows who share wisdom and encouragement, reassuring you of God’s presence and reminding you that he is always with you. *Content Notice: This material contains a discussion of suicide on Day 3. It is included for encouragement and edification.*
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Day 1
Scripture: Psalms 91:15
With Me
Not only is God not surprised by the road you’re walking today, but he is also right there with you. He’s not far off, uninterested, or passively standing by. He is actively sitting right in the middle of your pain and suffering beside you.
Today’s Scripture verse says that almighty God has called you by name and chosen you as his very own. Fear bows down in the name of Jesus. Why? Because God is with you. His power and purposes for your life are greater than anything the Enemy wants to throw at you. Jehovah Shammah is there, and he promises to never leave you or forsake you.
What a promise to take hold of in the dark of night! Friend, God hasn’t abandoned you, leaving you in the ruins. There will be restoration. He will be faithful to lead you all the way through and out of this season, one trusting step at a time. The Lord is there; he is with you.
Prayer: Lord, make rivers flow out of barren places. Help me see your hand in my life so everyone will know that you alone have helped me.
Day 2
Scripture: Exodus 17:15
My Banner
Recently, I came across a Bible that my big sister and brother-in-law gifted to me on my eighteenth birthday in 1975. Tucked inside the pages was a photo of me being baptized three years later. Finding the Bible and seeing the photo stirred up such emotion inside me.
As I thought back over the course of my life since my baptism in 1978, I had so much I wanted to say to that young girl. First, I would tell her that she was more than enough. Second, I would stress to her that she was loved beyond reason and worthy of that love. Finally, I would tell her to hold tight to the Lord, for she had no idea the life she was about to walk.
I realized how many times God had been Jehovah-Nissi, my banner, to me. His banner over me has always been love. His glorious banner waves over us as a reminder that he is here. He always has been, and he will forever lead us to victory.
Prayer: Help me to see and trust in you today, Lord God, my Jehovah-Nissi. I lift my hands high and proclaim your banner of love and victory over my life.
Day 3
Scripture: Psalms 68:5
Father to the Fatherless
One Sunday during the worship service that my husband led, he quoted Psalm 68:5. I remember thinking how wonderful these truths about God’s character were for all those women and children out there who did not have a husband or a father.
By the grace of God, that powerful and life-changing verse declaring God as Defender and Father planted its seed deep within my heart. Less than twenty-four hours later, a police officer gave me the news that my husband had taken his own life, leaving me a widow with the overwhelming responsibility of raising eight children.
The Enemy came to steal, kill, and destroy. Yet I had hope. The Holy Spirit had whispered to me the secret to abundant life just hours before God charted my family’s next season. He gave me his perspective and taught me to see his character through the lens of Psalm 68:5.
The message I shared with my kids the night of our tragedy has remained our foundation ever since: God promises to be a Father to the fatherless.
Prayer: Father, thank you for being my Father and Defender. I ask for your healing and your presence to be tangible in my life.
Day 4
Scripture: Romans 8:37
Conqueror
I remember reading today’s verse from Romans and exhaling as if a thousand-pound weight had been lifted off my grieving shoulders. In a sweet whisper from the Holy Spirit, I was reminded that Jesus doesn’t expect me to win my own battles.
Jesus is not surprised that I’m lying in the middle of the battlefield weeping. I am more than the conqueror of my own story because Jesus has already conquered my sin and sorrow on the cross, once and for all. As we battle each day, each season of life after loss, we have the ultimate warrior fighting for us.
I think of Gideon, the young man whom God called to fight a massive army with just three hundred men. I think of David, a teenager with a slingshot who defeated a barbaric giant. I think of Joshua, who took down the towering walls of Jericho with nothing but prayers and trumpets. None of these men had what they needed to win the impossible battles before them. But they surrendered and submitted and called out to God, our warrior, whose power and sovereignty are the only weapons we need.
Prayer: Jesus, the fight against sorrow and despair is impossible to win on my own. Be my strength.
Day 5
Scripture: 1 Timothy 1:14
God of all Grace
Loss reminds us that life is fleeting, a reminder we need from time to time. The feelings we feel now will end one day, and our end on earth will be the beginning of a new life somewhere else, somewhere far better than this.
If in our anger, heartache, grief, loneliness, and brokenness we find the ability to say, “It’s okay,” we can have grace. When we whisper, “It’s okay,” we replace shame with grace—and grace is the best gift we could ever give ourselves. Without grace, we will spend our one life always wishing things were different, and we will forget it’s all a gift.
Every single memory, every single day, every single moment, every single breath—a beautiful, precious gift. All grace! That means our Father has an inexhaustible supply of good gifts, which are available to all who will receive them, regardless of their performance.
We are alive, we are human, we have feelings, and it’s perfectly okay. We are not alone, and grace flows like a river from the heart of God.
Prayer: Holy Spirit, remind me of your grace. I receive it in my life.
Day 6
Scripture: Psalms 30:2-3
The Lord Who Heals
When we decide to walk into God’s promises of healing and redemption, the Enemy wages war over our stories of restoration and healing, attempting to convince us that the Lord is nowhere to be found.
But faith is a powerful weapon when we struggle to see the Lord fight on our behalf. That same faith is the foundation on which we stand when we ask God to enter and heal our broken hearts. We must choose faith when we’re fighting to see that the Lord is Jehovah Rapha, the Lord who heals.
The Israelites stood on the edge of the land that God had promised to them. However, they couldn’t behold its true beauty because they were focused on the obstacles before them. Today you can see the promise of God, or you can see the obstacles. Wield your weapon of faith as he enters your wilderness to heal you.
Prayer: Lord Jesus, help me to move beyond my fear and to embrace my wilderness. I know you are here with me and that I can be sure you will help me and heal our land.
Day 7
Scripture: Psalms 126:4-5
Yahweh
A few years ago, my life changed when I learned a simple fact about neuroscience. I remember hearing these words, and I knew I would never forget them: “Rachel, scientifically, you can only hold a strong emotion for ninety seconds.” Unbelievable because right now, the pain feels like it’s going to kill me. Chances are, you know that feeling. But when we fight the emotion, we make it worse by perpetuating the problem, giving it power over us, and keeping ourselves stuck.
When we have the awareness that overwhelming emotions initially last for no longer than ninety seconds, we can allow them to ripple through us, producing a wave without any resistance. We can let those emotions go without further reactions.
Psalm 126 is the well of all wells for the broken. It has given me life, and it has allowed me to rejoice in the tears that have given new birth to joy. God created us to hold emotion and release it. God created us to experience the wave and then surrender to his peace.
Prayer: Let the life swell in me, Jesus, and let me be wise with how I carry it. Yahweh, be with me.