Sexual Integrity: Young Men Born for WAR

Scriptures: John 10:8-11, Romans 8:28, Jeremiah 1:5, Psalms 32:8, 1 Peter 5:8, Isaiah 59:19

“You Didn’t Ask For This“

“Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” – 1 Peter 5:8 

You were born in a very strategic time in history. You were born at a time when the church will either rise up and bring the greatest revival the earth has ever seen, or she will become irrelevant as the world continues down the road of immortality, sexual deviancy, and sex worship. 

You were born during a war. The good news is that you were also born for war. Isaiah 59:19 says, 

“When the enemy shall come in like a flood, the Spirit of the Lord shall lift up a standard against Him.” 

There is no doubt that our Western culture is raising a flood of sexual indoctrination through public education and the media starting as early as kindergarten. This confusion has an answer, and it is you-with the Holy Spirit, knowledge of the Word, and practical tools. 

You are in a war you didn’t ask for, but you cannot avoid. 

Your private choices on your phone and devices are where one front of battle is. Never before in world history did parents hand a literal porn store to their children in the form of an unblocked cell phone. Not to mention all the pornography on social media outlets. 

Your eyes are in a war zone anytime you surf on the internet. As a warrior, you will have to be like Job, who said, 

“I made a covenant with mine eyes, why then should I think upon a maid.” (Job 31:1) 

Regardless of your age, gender, or social status, you are in this battle. My encouragement is if you are in a battle fighting for your sexual integrity – win it! I am going to share with you what this battle is really about and how you can win it so you can reach your destiny with little or no delay. 

Even if you have taken a beating, you are forgiven, and His Spirit is in you to keep fighting and to win. 

Questions: 

1. What are your thoughts about being born into a battle? 

2. What are your thoughts about being born for this war? 

3. What does it mean to fight for sexual integrity? 

Scriptures: 1 Corinthians 6:12-20, 1 John 2:16, John 15:18, Revelation 2:18-29

“The Prize“

Every war has a prize. Be it more land, resources, power, etc. What is the devil after in this sexual war in which he has placed billions of dollars to win? What is he really after? The answer is found in Revelation, specifically to the church of Thyatira. Start at verse 18 to the end. 

Verse 20: “Nevertheless, I have this against you. You tolerate that woman Jezebel, who calls herself a prophet by her teaching. She misleads my servants into sexual immorality and the eating of food sacrificed to idols.” 

The story continues how God felt about this and dealt with that woman, and I encourage you to read it all. 

However, I want you to know that this sexually immoral battle has been going on for thousands of years, and God consistently expresses His feelings of anger against this because He knows what it does to our bodies, our hearts, and our spirits. 

Let us be clear: the enemy of your soul is not after your sexuality per se, he is after something so much greater, which is shown in Revelation. Let‘s read it together like you were discovering something very valuable. This shook my world when I was about 19 or 20 years old. Revelation 2:26 says, 

 “To the one who is victorious and does my will to the end, I will give authority over the nations.” 

God wants to give you authority over the nations in your realm of giftedness in the future. The enemy wants to steal your future authority by giving you shame, fear, and worthlessness if you participate in pornography or sexual immorality. There is forgiveness for the past and grace to overcome in the present. 

When this was revealed that I, like you, was in the battle, I got free, and it seems God increased my influence from local, state, national, and to global with my Healing Time Ministry show on Daystar, airing all over the globe. 

Being free and having authority are connected, and so is being trapped and stuck. God’s plan is freedom and expanding your influence over the decades of your life. 

Questions: 

1. How did this help you understand what is at stake in this war? 

2. How do you think your future will be if you are winning this battle for decades? 

3. Explain why the enemy wants to attack your sexuality:

Scriptures: Deuteronomy 5:21, Psalms 144:1-2, Ephesians 6:11-18, Matthew 26:41, James 1:15, Philippians 4:8

“Winning Before You Start” 

“Praise be to the LORD my Rock, who trains my hands for war, my fingers for battle. He is my loving God and my fortress, my stronghold and my deliverer, my shield, in whom I take refuge, who subdues peoples under me.” – Psalm 144:1-2 

We know that in Christ, we are more than victorious in that He ultimately has won the war of sin and death. For that, we are grateful. However, the battle over sexual sin can be won by you before it starts to rage and ravage your life in the decades to come. 

We find the secret of winning this battle early in James 1:15, 

“Then when lust has conceived it bringeth forth sin: and sin when it is finished bringeth forth death.” 

You see, lust is a seed, and we are the fancy dirt it can live and grow in like a parasite. Lust has three stages, and I have seen these stages play out over the lives of people for decades. The first stage is lust. You plant lust in your heart. Usually, you do this secretly with images or fantasies. All of which is readily available. Seeds need to be in the dark (dirt) and watered (continued viewing lustfully) to grow. The second stage is sin, where you act out the seed you have planted. The third stage is death, which can be anything from shame or separation you feel, all the way to infidelity, leading to a divorce and ruining all you built over the decades. 

The way we win is at the first stage. Get a porn blocker for all your devices so it does not come to your eyes or your heart. Have accountability for all social media viewing to make it easier because all social media platforms have a very dark side that wants to trap you in lust. 

I have had clients put a rubber band on one of their wrists, snap it, and quote a scripture to stop them from lustfully looking at others. Some clients pray for anyone they are tempted to lust after. Fight lust with the Word of God by memorizing Philippians 4:8. 

“Finally brethren whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever are of good report: if there be any virtue and if there be any praise think on these things.” 

Questions: 

1. Where does the first battle of the war start? 

2. How would you like to fight lust?

Scriptures: Proverbs 22:6, Ephesians 6:1-4, 1 Corinthians 9:24-27, Hebrews 10:24-25, 1 John 1:9, James 5:16

“Talking To The Right Person“

“Do you not know that in a race all the runners run, but only one receives the prize? So run that you may obtain it. Every athlete exercises self-control in all things. They do it to receive a perishable wreath, but we an imperishable. So I do not run aimlessly; I do not box as one beating the air. But I discipline my body and keep it under control, lest after preaching to others I myself should be disqualified.” – 1 Corinthians 9:24-27 

I remember being in Bible school shortly after getting saved. When I got saved, cravings for alcohol and drugs left instantly; however, porn addiction needed to be fought and won. If you are in that situation where you did not get instantly free from lust, porn, or immorality, that just means you have to learn the biblical tools to win. That’s what I had to do, but I found myself talking to the wrong person. 

I would be in my dorm room in Bible college after a failure, crying out to God and asking for forgiveness; I read 1 John 1:9, 

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” 

I did this process of talking to Jesus and absolutely being forgiven. However, I was not healing or getting free from the lust and other behaviors. I was sincere, crying out to God, but still, change was not occurring. 

It was not until I was in seminary that God spoke to me to be honest with my roommate if I did something inappropriate. I must be honest here: the first couple of times I told him, I was humiliated, but then I started to get free. I have now been free (tested by a polygraph) for 40 years this summer. It is possible to be free for life. 

You say what is the difference between being forgiven and being healed. The key to healing is found in James 5:16, 

“Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that you may be healed.” 

When I was talking only to God, I was getting forgiven; when I told someone of the same gender, I started to heal. This works I have seen thousands of people set free from lust and sexual sins by having a mature accountability partner. I still have accountability today to make sure I stay free. 

Pick a mature spiritual leader and ask them if you can be accountable to them. Call them before you do something. Just when the temptation starts, call, and you will be amazed how the temptation can flee. 

Questions: 

1.How would you explain the difference between forgiveness and healing? 

2.What are your feelings or thoughts about having a person of the same gender you could be accountable to?

Scriptures: 2 Corinthians 10:5, 1 Corinthians 6:18, Romans 12:2, 1 Peter 1:13, Colossians 3:2

“Your Brain” 

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ. 2 Corinthians 10:5 

Your brain is in the battle, for sure. I am not just talking about taking your thoughts captive and transforming your mind (Romans 1). I am talking about your actual brain, that grey mass between your ears. 

We are so wonderfully and amazingly made. Our sexuality hugely includes our brains. When we have a sexual experience, be it with a real person or image, we experience the highest chemical reward in our brains. These endogenous opiates flood the prefrontal cortex of your brain. This part of your brain is not fully developed until your early twenties. 

I remember when I was in Bible school and seminary, asking my professors to explain why sexual sin was different than all other sins. 1 Corinthians 6:18 teaches us: 

“Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a person commits are outside the body, but whoever sins sexually sins against their own body.” 

When we engage our body in sexual behavior outside of marriage, these chemicals create a reward scenario in our body to desire to repeat this behavior. That is why it can seem so hard to fight this in the beginning. The more you repeat the behavior, the stronger the desire. 

Having helped thousands of people from every age group get freedom, they also report that when you stop after a few months, your body is not fighting you nearly as much because you are not rewarding it to lust. The longer you are free, the easier it is from a biological perspective to stay free. 

Questions: 

1.What are your thoughts about your brain being in the battle? 

2.What do you think about 1 Corinthians 6:18 now?

Scriptures: Job 1:10, Proverbs 4:23, 1 Corinthians 10:13, Ephesians 6:11, Psalms 119:9-11

“Hedge Your Bet”

“No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.” 1 Corinthians 10:13

You have heard the term hedge your bet. This means to figure out what is best or more likely to happen so when you bet you win. Now, of course, I am in no way encouraging any form of gambling.

However, what if you could set up a situation where you are more likely to win this sexual battle you were born into instead of being another casualty of the war? In Job 1:10, the enemy says to God about Job, 

“Have you not put a hedge around him and his household and everything he has?”

You see, when you want to protect something, you build a hedge and put up boundaries so you can be safe. What boundaries can be helpful for you to win this battle?

I have helped thousands of people win this battle, so let me give you some ideas about building a hedge. First, block whatever source of temptation is coming at you. This might seem radical, but much is at stake to win this battle.

1. Consider getting off all social media platforms or having boundaries and accountability with them.

2. Consider only having connections with people you actually meet in person.

3. Consider getting a porn blocker or accountability software for all devices.

4. Consider having an accountability partner for your thoughts, temptations, and behaviors.

5. Consider proactive behaviors like reading the Bible, memorizing scripture, and morning and evening prayer.

6.Write out your long-term goals for your life so you know who you are fighting for.

7. Write a letter to your future spouse on how you protected your sexuality for them.

8. Write your future children a letter on how you won the sexual battle when you were younger and what a life without secrets or shame is like.

Questions:

1.What day did you or will you commit to building a hedge of protection for yourself, your future spouse, and your children?

2.What are hedges you think will be helpful for you at this stage of your life?

Scriptures: Galatians 5:1, John 8:36, Isaiah 61:1, Psalms 119:45

“What Freedom Looks Like” 

“It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery.” Galatians 5:1 

When you look into your future, what do you hope to see? Do you hope to see you living your dreams, being shameless, not able to explain how blessed you are in your life, marriage, and family, and advancing the kingdom with your talents? That could all be yours if you win this battle. The scripture says in 2 Corinthians 3:17, 

“Now the Lord is Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” 

I have lived a life of winning this battle for over 40 years. I have seen my life, health, wealth, relationships, and influence all grow unexplainably with God’s blessings. I have seen thousands get free in their 20’s, 30’s, 40’s, 50’s and older. I have consistently seen men and women repair their marriages and families. I have seen them regain and experience intimacy with God like never before in their lives. I have seen so many men and women who control their own income, business owners, salespeople, etc., double or more than double their income in just 12 months. 

I have heard people explain how free they feel not having any secrets. They state being free from any and all anxiety from anyone finding out what they are doing in secret because they are not doing anything inappropriate. 

Freedom is an amazing lifestyle to live, and we choose that on a daily basis. You have heard freedom is not free. That is so true, but fortunately for those who believe in Christ, He paid in full for our freedom. My encouragement would be to fight for your freedom while you are as young as you are and enjoy the joys of your freedom for the rest of your life. 

Reflection: 

Write out what freedom would look like for you over the next couple of decades.