Let’s face it; every woman has a mental wish list of the qualities she would like her spouse to possess. There are several attributes that every woman should look for while selecting her life partner, even though not all of the criteria will be realistic. Join me for ten minutes daily in this three-day Bible reading plan to find out the major things you need to look for in a husband.
Evans Francis
Day 1
Scriptures: Psalms 37:37, Ephesians 4:25, Colossians 3:9
Honest Husband
Who would argue against being honest? But many husbands and wives consider dishonesty a good idea under certain conditions. The fact is that marriages are ruined by dishonesty, not by honesty (Psalm 37:37).
If a husband does not provide honest and open communication, trust can be undermined, and feelings of security can be destroyed. Then you can’t trust the signals being sent, and you have no foundations on which to build a solid relationship. Instead of growing together, you grow apart (Ephesians) 4:25. You would identify an honest husband if:
1. He reveals his positive and negative emotional reactions to the events in your life, particularly his behavior. It’s best if you have a steady flow of accurate data from each other. Honesty enables a couple to make appropriate adjustments to each other. Both of you are growing and changing with each new day, and you must constantly adjust to each other’s changes. But you can’t make the proper adjustments if you’re not receiving accurate information. Honest feelings need to be expressed and received. Complaints must be heard and honored.
2. He reveals information about his personal history, particularly events that demonstrate personal weakness or failure. He comes clean with you about embarrassing experiences or serious mistakes. The inclinations that led him to do something in his past are still a part of his nature, and the effects of certain situations have molded who he is. These things need to be shared. This also means that he will disclose any past sexual relationships if you understand each other completely.
3. He reveals information about the events of his day. He keeps you posted about his activities, emphasizing those that may affect you. In good marriages, couples become so interdependent that sharing a daily schedule is essential to coordinating activities.
4. He reveals his thoughts and plans regarding future activities and objectives. And never do anything without an enthusiastic agreement between both of you. If he genuinely respects you, he will want your input and support on the decision and agreement on the direction.
5. He will not leave you with a false impression about his thoughts, feelings, habits, likes, dislikes, personal history, daily activities, or plans for the future. Neither of you should deliberately keep personal information from your spouse.
Only honesty will make an emotional climate possible where trust will be born, which will be the basis for achieving an emotionally balanced couple. I pray that in your course of searching for a good husband, you will not fall into the hands of the dishonest ones.
Day 2
Scriptures: Colossians 3:19, 1 Corinthians 10:24, 1 Peter 4:8
A True Supporter
If you are a supportive person, you are a kind of treasure for your partner. Now, the million-dollar question is: Is he one of those people always there to support their partner? Are you lucky enough to belong to this select group? Read on to discover some of the characteristics of a supportive husband. Knowing them gives you a higher chance of making the right selection.
1. He always has time to talk about your plans.
No matter how tired he is, when it comes to listening and discussing your goals and plans, he always has time. That is called being supportive and having empathy toward the other person (Colossians 3:19).
2. He encourages your ideas.
It doesn’t matter what kind of idea it is. If he is understanding, he will encourage you. It is not always necessary that he agrees, because sometimes ideas can be far-fetched, but if he has enough criteria, he will be able to distinguish between good ideas and bad ones.
4. He knows when you need a break.
If he knows how to support you, he won’t need to listen to you ask for a break (1 Corinthians 10:24). Just by seeing you, he will realize that you need a few minutes in silence or alone. He will know how to read you like an open book.
5. He tries to empathize with your problems.
It is not about correcting the problems immediately but empathizing and understanding how you feel. By saying, “I understand you,” he will give you greater peace of mind because perhaps what you are looking for is not an immediate solution but someone who understands what you feel at that moment.
6. Sometimes, he knows that he is not your main priority.
Although this may sound a bit selfish, it does not mean it is bad; quite the opposite. It may be that you are focused at that moment on a problem that you must solve and you do not pay him the same attention as always (1 Peter 4:8). However, if he is supportive, you both will be sure that this is temporary and will soon pass. This is what characterizes people who will always be there to support their partner. I pray we all have a supportive spouse.
I pray that the Lord will direct your path toward finding a loving and supportive husband.
Day 3
Scriptures: 1 Timothy 5:8, Colossians 3:19, 1 Peter 3:7, Galatians 6:10
Hardworking Man
From the account of the creation of the world, man is charged with the mission of filling the earth and dominating it (Genesis 1:28) or of cultivating it and guarding it (Genesis 2:15). God’s plan corresponds to the realization of man’s vocation. It is not a question of slavery, nor an obligation without foundation, but of a blessing, of happiness to live.
The husband’s role in the Bible starts with leadership but encompasses provision and protection. A husband will never influence his wife if he does not care for her. He can demand, and she may follow as a result, but he will never truly have her heart unless he provides for her needs, cares for her well-being, and protects her physically and spiritually. As Scripture says:
“Anyone who does not provide for their relatives, and especially for their household, has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever” (1 Timothy 5:8).
“Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them” (Colossians 3:19).
“Husbands, be considerate as you live with your wives and treat them with respect as the weaker partner and as heirs with you of the gracious gift of life so that nothing will hinder your prayers” (1 Peter 3:7).
God loves His daughters and the children they bear. When He gives one of His daughters to a man, He desires that the man cares for her. In no place does Scripture teach or endorse that women and children be considered second class or inferior to men. Instead, He finds them so precious that He asks for special care to be given them, care that only biblically based men can provide. Women are very capable of taking care of themselves. However, God made men and women different; thus, due to the physical nature and strength God gave men, He has charged them with providing for and protecting their families.
If a man does not take care of his own, including his wife, children, and especially those who belong to his own house—that is, those who share the same household of faith as him—then, according to Galatians 6:10, he has denied the doctrine of faith and should be treated as an apostate from the Christian faith.
I pray that the Lord will divinely help you locate that man who is hardworking and deems it fit to always take the duty of provision seriously.