As moms, we’re under constant pressure. Impossible standards leave us oscillating between worry, fear, anger, and shame. They threaten to steal all the wonder from parenting, life, and our personal relationship with God. In this 5-day study, discover how the gospel message can empower you to parent in the freedom of God’s sovereignty. So you can breathe deeper, walk lighter, and enjoy your children—and the parenting journey—more than ever before.
LifeWay Women
Day 1
Scripture: 2 Corinthians 1:8-10
The Pressure
When was the last time you remember saying to another mom something like, “You know, this parenting thing isn’t that hard after all. I mostly feel like I’ve got it mastered, and the pressure to get it all right doesn’t really phase me. I don’t know why everyone else thinks it’s so complicated and exhausting”?
You can’t remember saying that? OK, good. Because neither can I. In fact, I’ve never said that.
What I can remember saying to another mom is that I am so overwhelmed I mostly feel like I have no idea what I’m doing, and I often feel like I get it wrong. Don’t let that concern you, as this isn’t a study about how to be like me. If it were, we’d be in big trouble. This is a study about how to parent freely in the assurance of and reliance on the sovereignty and grace of God. And rest assured, I have to go back to the good news every single day in order to live and parent that way. Because I, like you, feel the pressure.
We are under so much pressure.
We think that if we just keep trying harder to be better examples and do more for our kids, we will finally become the moms we long to be. But, we’re exhausted. This is just no way to live and parent. It’s not how our heavenly Father created us to live and parent. But there is a better way.
We are going to start to discover the better way by turning to 2 Corinthians. This book of the Bible was a letter written by the apostle Paul to the church in Corinth. The Corinthian church was comprised of mostly inconsistent believers who had embraced a false gospel and were experiencing affliction. Paul wrote to them as someone who was well acquainted with affliction, and out of his great love for these people, he pleaded with them to embrace the true gospel.
Read 2 Corinthians 1:8-10.
The apostle Paul understood pressure. Note what he said in verse 8. In the NIV translation, Paul writes, “We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself.”
In verse 9, Paul showed us what pressure and peril are intended to do. He wrote in the NIV, “But this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, who raises the dead.”
Oh friend, how applicable this is to our parenting. The pressure we are under is intended to make us rely on God. Parenting is about us relying on God to be enough for our children and for us.
Day 2
Scripture: Psalms 46:10
Cease Striving to be “Enough”
I stumbled from my bed to the medicine cabinet to find something, anything, that would relieve my son’s pain. Through squinted, burning eyes, I read the time on the clock as I entered the bathroom. 2 a.m. Only a mere hour after he’d last woken up in pain, and I’d soothed him to sleep with back scratching and prayers for healing. I don’t know when we fell back to sleep again, but I do know the sun came up too quickly and greeted me with a to-do list that I’d be lucky to tackle on a good night’s sleep.
Before my feet hit the floor I prayed, I will not treat my blessings as burdens. Lord, help me. I don’t want to treat my blessings as burdens. My heart was centered, but reality still loomed. Our refrigerator was empty. The new puppy needed exercise. I had a meal to cook for my neighbor who was ill, and I had fifty emails to return. But before that, I’d still need to make breakfast and get the other boys out the door with a smile on my face and a prayer on my lips. We wouldn’t have time to read our devotion that morning. We’d barely have time to breathe. My insides groaned, “I can’t. I must. But I can’t.”
Maybe you’ve had a morning like this? The kind where you are painfully aware that the physical and mental demands of parenting are going to push you far beyond your human limitations, and you’re once again assured, “I am not enough for this. Definitely not enough.”
God has a simple but profound message for us regarding our quest to be enough.
Read Psalm 46:10.
Oh, how profound this is for our lives and for our parenting. God is firmly but tenderly wanting us to hear Him assure us, Enough, my dear daughter, of trying to be enough. Know that I, not you, am God. And I am good at being God.
I have actually clung to this verse for years. In fact, I have this verse written on a sticky note just above my desk because, as a girl prone to striving to be enough, I need to be reminded of this truth every day. On the note I wrote the NASB Bible translation, which says, “Cease striving and know that I am God.”
Let’s not miss this. We can stop striving to be enough, because who God is (sovereign) and what God gives us in the person and work of Jesus Christ (grace) is enough.
Day 3
Scripture: Romans 8:32
God Is Sovereign
When praying for my kids, I have always used the words, “my boys” or “my sons.” There is, of course, nothing wrong with praying this way. God entrusted these boys to my husband and me to raise to His glory. But on one particular and unforgettable night, while crying out to God about a painful hardship one of my boys was facing and feeling completely incompetent to help him navigate it, I felt the Holy Spirit remind me that these boys are first and foremost sons of God. That as much as I love them and long for them, they were created by Him, they belong to Him, and His love and desire for them is infinitely more profound and pure than even mine. In light of this truth, I began to pray “Your sons,” rather than “my sons” to be reminded that He is their all-knowing, all-powerful Father. And because God is sovereign and full of grace, He can be trusted with the children He has entrusted to me.
I truly believe that it is only when we surrender to this truth that we will finally be free and empowered to thrive in our mothering. We have to know what Scripture says and trust the power it holds to free us (Matt. 22:29). So I want us to look at a passage that speaks to the sovereignty and goodness of God.
Read Romans 8:32.
This is the truth we have to remember when our children are bullied or rejected by their peers, when they are battling sin and temptation, when their feelings get hurt or their hearts get broken, when they struggle with substance abuse or eating disorders, when they make wrong choices, or when they simply don’t feel lovable or valuable. When our hearts break for our kids and we long to right every wrong in their lives, we have to remember they have a sovereign and good heavenly Father.
To say that God is sovereign is not to say that our children don’t have free will. Indeed, God has given all of us free will. We are all responsible for the choices we make, and our choices matter. However, God is not limited by our choices. He is continually working everything together “for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them” (Rom. 8:28, NLT).
Remembering our good Father’s sovereignty relieves so much of the pressure we experience in motherhood. It’s not all up to you, and it’s not all up to me—and praise Him for that!
Day 4
Scripture: 2 Corinthians 12:7-10
I can remember, so clearly, the first time I heard the expression, “Be the person you want your children to become.” I had two children at the time, ages four and two, but my third was on the way. And I was a mess. Overwhelmed, discouraged, and disappointed in who I’d become—as my weaknesses and shortcomings were all being revealed and magnified through motherhood. So you can imagine the grief and despair I felt when I read an article urging me to be the person I wanted my children to become. Because, here’s the thing—I thought that being the person I wanted them to become meant being perfect. I thought God was relying on me to be a perfect example for my kids to follow.
We must remember, though, our children don’t need us to be the perfection of Christ. They need to see us in pursuit of Christ. They need us to point them to Christ. They need to see the power of Christ made perfect in our weaknesses.
We see this so beautifully demonstrated in Paul’s own life.
Read 2 Corinthians 12:7-10.
Paul shifted from begging God to remove his thorn to being glad to boast about the weaknesses it revealed—all at the mention of God’s all-sufficient grace.
Grace is the unearned and undeserved favor of God.
Grace is the means by which God saves, sustains, sanctifies, and strengthens us in the person and work of Jesus Christ.
Grace has no limits or conditions. In fact, grace with conditions isn’t grace at all.
Scripture doesn’t reveal the exact nature of Paul’s thorn—whether it was physical, psychological, or situational. But Scripture does tell us what the thorn was intended to do.
The thorn was intended to keep Paul humble. Could it be that God loved Paul enough to give him the thorn to protect him from pride, to allow him to experience God’s grace in profound ways, and to keep Paul reliant on God to provide everything he would need? Grace has no limits or conditions.
The Lord’s gracious assurance to Paul is the very same assurance He gives to you and to me. When we are striving but not succeeding at being flawless examples for our kids to follow, God says, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So, just like the apostle Paul, we can boldly respond, So now I can be glad to be honest with my children about my weaknesses, so that the divine power of Christ can work through me in my parenting. When I confess I am weak, I am finally strong.
Day 5
Scriptures: Psalms 5:3, Psalms 118:5-9, Proverbs 3:5-6, Isaiah 26:3-4, Philippians 4:6-7
Personal Prayer Through Scripture
To end the week, let’s do a prayer activity to practice parenting open handed. Prayer is a powerful way to demonstrate our need for Christ and our reliance on Him for our kids.
In 1 Peter 5:6-7, Peter told us to do two things. Humble ourselves and cast all of our anxiety on God. But it’s “why” Peter told us to do this that always gets me. It’s because God cares for us. My fellow mom, God cares so deeply for you. That means He cares about the things that you care about.
Casting our anxiety, worries, and problems on God is actually a very humbling act because it requires acknowledging that He is God, and we are not. And it requires our trust in Him. God is big enough and strong enough to bear the burdens and worries that are weighing you down. Will you join me now in casting it all on Him?
Today, we’ll look at a few Scriptures that convey peace and repel worry. I hope you’ll use these verses as prayers to our Father who is sovereign and full of grace.
Look up one verse or a few and personalize them, making them into prayers to God for peace in the midst of worry and fear. You might like to write them out in a separate note-taking journal or in the “Notes” app on your phone. Or, you may just want to think through them in a prayerful state of mind.
Psalm 5:3
Psalm 118:5-9
Proverbs 3:5-6
Isaiah 26:3-4
Philippians 4:6-7
How can we apply these truths to parenting our children? What does relying on God look like for you in your parenting?