Caring for aging adults is an honor and a privilege with challenges and opportunities. Ephesians 6:2 – 3 shares this: “Honor your father and mother – the first commandment with a promise – so that it may go well with you…” Some aspects of elder care bring great joy. Others are disorienting. This plan encourages you to lean into the Lord and embrace the time with those you love.
Charlotte Guest
Day 1
Scriptures: Ephesians 6:2-3, Galatians 5:22-25, 2 Corinthians 12
Offer the Same Grace You’ve Been Given
As the journey of elder care begins, amazing grace is needed…so are all of the fruits of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness gentleness and self-control. It’s a bit humbling, yet also helpful to remember to offer the same grace to your elders that has been given to you. It’s actually a command to do so.
Just think of how your Heavenly Father has cared for you. He’s always there, day after day, offering grace to you and for you. This gift never runs out. He is by your side as you care for your loved one. After all, He created those special fruits of the spirit and loves to bestow them. His fruit basket constantly overflows.
Some days, you’ll need more patience. Other days, you might need an extra moment of peace or need to practice self-control. Every day, you will need His love to be love. Call out to Him. He will answer. He’s counting on you to be His hands and feet and to have His heart as you care for others. While you care for those elders entrusted to you, He’ll care for you. His grace is new every morning and His cup of grace for you never runs out.
Lord, thank You for amazing grace. Help me reflect You as I care for my loved one. Help me to be Your hands and feet and to offer more than I expect to receive. Help me to offer love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, faithfulness and gentleness. Help me be self-controlled and to be full of empathy and wisdom. May I truly keep in step with Your spirit. Thank you, Lord, that your mercies are new every morning. Refresh me each day and fill me with You so I may overflow to those I love. I know, with You, all things are possible.
Day 2
Scriptures: Proverbs 19:21, James 1:5, Hebrews 13:20-21
You Are Prepared to Provide
You may not feel prepared to provide what your loved one needs as they age but, through Christ, you are. It also may feel like your own plans are placed on hold and, in all honestly, they may be for a while. If you arise each day and ask Him to show you His plans for how to care for your loved one, you will discover a greater purpose.
What feels like a small thing to you may be a big help to your loved one. Perhaps your purpose is to listen a bit better or to help with what seems like a menial task. You may need to offer words of wisdom or simply prepare a meal or two. Your days of care may be all-encompassing too…involving doctor visits, new living arrangements and tasks that seem too difficult.
Remember that so many of the faithful people in the Bible felt ill-equipped and unprepared to do what God called them to do. Moses believed he was an inadequate speaker. Mary and Joseph were unmarried and so young, most likely in their teenage years. Yet, God called them to lead His people and to raise Jesus. The saying “If God calls you to it, He’ll get you through it” is inspiring. He will help you prepare to provide love, grace, mercy, time and tenderness to those you love. Reach out, too, to your community for help. A senior services care agency could be just a phone call away and there is great help regarding eldercare online. The Alzheimer’s Association has a 24-hour help line and many resources. Search the scriptures. The Bible offers so much encouragement and support when we feel unprepared. With God, ALL things are possible.
Heavenly Father, I need you. Some days I feel overwhelmed and ill-prepared to care for my loved one. As some of my plans are placed on hold, help me remember Your plans for those I love. You have all I need to help me care for others. Show me your purposes for those I love. Prepare me each day to offer You through my words and actions. Help me remember I do not have to do this alone. You created us for community. Help guide me to the people and resources who can help me as I care for those You have entrusted to me. Thank you that You always are by my side.
Day 3
Scriptures: Proverbs 4:1, John 10:4, Psalms 116:2
Listening Is Loving
Mother Teresa said, “Before you speak, it is necessary for you to listen, for God speaks in the silence of your heart.” As you lean in to listen to the Lord while caring for your aging loved one, God will speak to you. Quiet moments of reflection and listening well to your Heavenly Father will bless you and provide direction as you offer care.
Taking time to simply sit and be present with your aging adult is a gift in itself. Listening to them is a form of loving. Deep, compassionate listening helps your loved feel secure, better able to share from their heart. Listening well honors and affirms them, providing safety and security. Those we love long to be heard and understood.
Your loved one will be more inclined to trust you in this phase of life because they know your voice. You are familiar to them. Just as sheep follow a trusting shepherd, your loved one will look to you for guidance. May you listen well and follow His voice as you care for them. God always is available to listen to you. He has His ear bent toward you, ready to hear from you each day.
Lord, thank You for the gift of Your voice and direction through the Holy Spirit, Your word and others You place in my path. Help me make and take time to sit with You each day. Offer me direction as I care for those I love. Help me to love well and to honor them through my words and actions. Just as I know Your voice, Lord, help my voice be reassuring. May I reflect You in all I say and do in their presence. Thank You that You hear me Lord, and provide all I need.
Day 4
Scriptures: Psalms 126:3, Job 8:21, James 1:2
Find Joy in the Journey
There is the opportunity to find joy in this new journey of caregiving. Joy can be found most anywhere if you seek it out. Often characterized by sadness and frustration, the latter years of your loved one’s life are meant to be full of love and connectivity. My mother, a former preschool and Sunday school teacher, taught often that JOY stands for:
Jesus
Others
Yourself
Even in her older age, she prays to remember that special kind of JOY: keep Jesus first, then others and thinking of self, last. Of course, you will need boundaries for many instances and situations. As you pour out, He’ll show you what you need and how to fill back up.
We are called to be joy and to offer joy. With the Lord’s help, you can. Focus on the things you appreciate along the way in this care-giving season. Verbally express gratitude. There are countless ways your Heavenly Father shows His joy each day. You will find joy in big and small things. Perhaps you’ll catch a beautiful sunrise or enjoy a warm cup of coffee and some quiet moments before you begin a day of care-giving. You may hear joy in the laughter of your loved one or see joy in their eyes, even if it’s just a glimpse.
This transition time offers you an opportunity to slow down and share some meaningful moments. Watch God work in ways that will go beyond your own plans and dreams. This care-giving journey offers unique times to think of all the ways the Lord has met your needs and the needs of those you love. Choose joy! Arise each day and look for the joy set before you. Some days, joy may come naturally to you; other days, it’s a choice. Each and every day, joy is available simply by asking your Heavenly Father to provide.
Dear God, help me to seek joy and to be joy. Help me rise above my own feelings and thoughts and tap in to You…my source of all joy. Lord as You share in Your word in James 1, help me to “consider it pure joy” when I face trials. May those trials faced in care-giving be opportunities to share joy. Show me how to look for joy in the journey and to offer more than I expect to receive with joy in my heart.
Day 5
Scriptures: Deuteronomy 31:8, Philippians 4:6, 1 Peter 5:7
Let Go of Worry
Jesus said this to his disciples: “In the world, you will have trouble. But…take heart! I have overcome the world.” Caring for aging adults often is trying. None of us are exempt from trials and challenges, weariness and frustrations. As the apostle Paul wrote in Philippians, affliction exists. Yet, he encourages us to not be anxious. Worry can cause anxiety and fear which can cloud our thinking and inhibit us from loving others well.
As we learn to let go of worry, this makes space for the peace of God, which “transcends all understanding.” May you “guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” Praying in the midst of distress actually produces peace. This peace will help you make wise decisions as well as help you make the most of each circumstance.
Philippians 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. Make praying to God and a regular prayer time daily priorities. Slow down and relax; breathe deeply when you need to reset. Worrying can take you out of precious present moments. Letting go of worry and letting God have each trial will help you throughout this phase of life.
Father God, help me let go of worry and anything that brings me down as I care for my loved one. Fill me with energy as I tire and give me the certainty that comes from knowing and following You. As I make decisions and offer care, give me peace. Help me prioritize what is necessary for each day and lay down what is not. Thank You for going before me and for walking beside me. In You, I put my trust.
Day 6
Scriptures: Joshua 24:15, Psalms 118:24, Zephaniah 3:5
Embrace Today
A real blessing is that you get to choose how to spend your time. My grandmother, Nana, used to say: “We all have 24 hours in each day; what we decide to do with that time is a choice.” She never liked when people said: “I don’t have time…” We do have the gift of time.
There are so many ways you can embrace today! Learn to enjoy the time you spend with your aging loved one. Treasure their company. Try spending your waking moments with the Lord and experience His peace as you embrace the day. Those quiet moments with Him will help you prepare to love others well.
Today, and every day, cultivate an “attitude of gratitude” and be thankful. Notice the value in life’s simple pleasures. Find something beautiful to appreciate every day. Pray for positivity and purpose. Align your heart with His and ask Him to show you “today’s way.”
Albert Einstein said “Learn from yesterday, live for today.” Thanking God for all you have learned is a great first step to letting go of the unhealthy attachments and yesterdays that can get in the way of enjoying and living for today. It’s hard to embrace today with yesterday’s baggage weighing you down. Clean out any clutter that holds you back from loving well in the moment. Your aging adult will appreciate a little time, love and tenderness from you each day.
Lord, help me embrace today. Thank You for the gift of time and for the choices set before me each day. Help me choose how to spend the time You bestow wisely. Help me hear Your voice in the stillness and quiet moments. Prepare me, each day, to love others well. May I have a grateful heart and see You in special ways each and every day. Show me how to walk out living and loving well.
Day 7
Scriptures: Romans 8:28, Proverbs 27:1, Revelation 22:5
Peace As You Plan for Tomorrow
Caring for aging adults offers both challenges and opportunities. Planning ahead and choosing how you help them live in this new stage of life also can be enjoyable and purposeful. In fact, these days can be full and fulfilling, interesting and meaningful. It’s a time to help those you care for dream new dreams and make new plans. The focus tends to shift in this phase from “making a living” to making meaning from life.
Planning well for their future helps your loved one move forward with peace and assurance in this transition time. There’s no time better than today than to plan for tomorrow. Noah had to plan well and prepare long before the rains came.
Remember, as you make plans, both for you and your loved one, take your plans to the Lord. He knows what’s best for you and your family. Set reachable goals for the future…for health and spirituality, for relationships and finances. You may be asked to help your loved one leave a legacy. Purposeful planning entails following His will. May you find guidance in His word, the Bible, and in other believers you trust. A God-given vision will give you purpose and eternal significance for yourself and those you love.
Jesus taught that you must not be overly consumed though with plans for tomorrow. Your confidence must come from trusting Him and His will for your life. After all, the ultimate tomorrow becomes a blessed, eternal forever, when you and your loved one will enjoy the visible presence of our lord Jesus Christ in eternity. Thankfully, no matter what tomorrow brings, you can live in full dependence on the Lord and in eager anticipation of a glorious, forever future. May your days with your aging loved one feel full of hope. May you be a light of love and shine bright as you care for them each day.
Lord, as I complete this plan, help me to have continual peace as I plan for tomorrow. Help me share with my loved one that their life is meaningful. May I be intentional in my loving thoughts and actions as I care for them. Thank You Lord that You know the future and help me place my trust in You. I find comfort and great peace that You are walking alongside me, today and every day. Thank You that we will experience eternal life in You and through you. May I offer light and hope as I care for others. Thank You for caring for me and showing me Your way today, and every day.