Scripture: Romans 12:1-2

Prioritize Your Relationship with God

Are you enjoying your single season? Or are you struggling to find peace and contentment in this time of your life? Do you feel like you’re missing out on something or that everyone around you is in a relationship while you’re stuck alone? Those feelings are common, but there are ways to find peace in your single season. It starts by focusing on the relationship in your life that matters the most: your relationship with God.

Whether you’re single, dating, engaged, married, or have some other relationship status, the most important relationship in your life should always be with God. But the truth is, sometimes it’s hard to prioritize time with God when you’re dating and want to spend all your free time with that special person. That’s what makes your single season so unique and an ideal time to get intimate with the Lord. You can use this time to establish your priorities and develop habits of spending time with God through prayer, worship, Bible study, church, and more. When you prioritize these things in your single season, it will be much easier to continue prioritizing them when you’re in a dating relationship.

Romans 12:1-2 is a reminder that you belong to God, first and foremost. And your life is transformed from the inside out when you spend time with Him. From that transformation comes an understanding of God’s perfect will for your life, including your relationships. So, the more time you spend getting to know God and His plans for you now, the easier it will be to follow God’s will for your life in your dating relationships. Plus, when you spend time with God, you’re bound to experience more joy, peace, and hope in every area of your life.

Keep yourself accountable to prioritize your relationship with God in your single season by dedicating a specific time to Him each day. Whether it’s every day at noon on your lunch break or first thing in the morning before your busy day starts, commit that time to God. That way, when your single season is over and your dating season starts, your daily habits still prioritize the most important relationship in your life.

Practice Pursuing Peace: Take a moment to pray and ask God what it looks like to actively prioritize a relationship with Him. Write down three ways you can pursue God intentionally during this season of singleness.

Scriptures: Psalms 16:11, John 10:10

Pursue Your Passions

If you’re like most singles, you probably swing back and forth between enjoying your single season and wishing it was over. On the one hand, being single has its perks. You get to focus on yourself, pursue your interests, and spend time with friends without worrying about or having to consider another person’s needs. But on the other hand, being single can be lonely and frustrating at times. It’s essential to find ways to enjoy life on your own to experience peace in your single season.

Regardless of your relationship status, you shouldn’t rely on someone else to bring joy, excitement, adventure, or purpose into your life. That’s between you and God. In John 10:10, Jesus makes it clear that He came to give us abundant life. By spending time with God daily (like we talked about yesterday), you can come to understand His will and purpose for your life. Then, you can wholeheartedly pursue opportunities that align with your calling and make the most of your single season doing what you love.

It’s not to say that you can no longer pursue your passions and “seize the day” once you’re dating someone. The goal is to find a person who shares similar interests, goals, and dreams as you so that you can enjoy life together. However, things change when you get into a relationship, and sometimes you have to compromise for the benefit of the other person. That’s what makes your single season the perfect time to enjoy life to the fullest. Travel the world. Build a business. Get a degree or two or three. Make lifelong friendships. Call your mom. Go fishing with your dad. Climb Mount Everest! Take advantage of not having the responsibility of a relationship right now, and seek unforgettable experiences. Not only will doing so bring a ton of joy into your life, but it will also help you be at peace with your single season.

Practice Pursuing Peace: Take a moment to pray and ask God to reveal the desires of your heart that He’s placed within you. Write down three ways you can pursue those while you’re single.

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Prepare to Date Well

If you want a dating relationship that one day leads to a loving, Christ-centered marriage, your single season is an excellent time to prepare. This doesn’t mean the first person you date after your season of singleness will be “the one.” (Though, of course, we’re all rooting for them to be!) However, when you know what a Christ-centered marriage looks like, you can pursue it even in dating relationships.

Dating should definitely be an enjoyable time of getting to know someone, having fun, and seeing if there’s a spark that can lead to more. But unfortunately, it is commonly a time of hurt, misunderstanding, and heartbreak. Why? Because people aren’t prepared to treat their dating relationship with the care, consideration, and respect it deserves. Rather than taking dating too seriously, most people don’t take it seriously enough, and people end up hurt and heartbroken.

The good news? You can prepare yourself to date well by understanding the Biblical purpose of relationships. You can build your dating relationships on the same foundations of a healthy marriage–respect, selflessness, honor, loyalty, and love. Consider how love is described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. It is patient and kind. It isn’t jealous, proud, or selfish. It doesn’t dishonor others or keeprecords of wrongs. It isn’t easily angered and doesn’t delight in evil. Love always protects, trusts, hopes, and perseveres.

This passage isn’t just referring to how you should treat someone once you’ve fallen in love with them or have decided to marry them. This love is how God calls His people to treat everyone, including the people you date. There is a good chance that you’ll go on many dates with multiple people before you find your forever person. But just because someone isn’t the husband or wife for you doesn’t mean they deserve to be treated differently than another person. If it sounds a little “deep” or “heavy,” that’s because it is–because God intends for us to date well. And your season of singleness is a perfect time to learn more about what that looks like practically. That way, when the time comes for your next relationship, you can approach it in a Christ-like manner that provides a positive experience for both people, even if they aren’t your forever person.

Some of the anxiety and worry you feel in your single season is related to the anticipation of a dating relationship. Who will it be with? What will they be like? Will they be “the one?” Rather than mulling over these questions in your head, you can calm your thoughts and experience peace when you focus on preparing well. Because the thing is, you don’t know who it’s going to be, but you can know how you’re going to approach the relationship regardless. Knowing brings a sense of peace, so focus on what you do know and can control–how you will approach your next relationship.

Practice Pursuing Peace: Take a moment to pray and ask God to show you areas in your dating life that you can improve. Write down three ways to grow in those areas and prepare for your next relationship.

Scriptures: 1 Thessalonians 5:11, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Put Yourself in Single Circles

As a single Christian, there are probably times when you feel like you’re the only one. Like everyone else has found their forever person, and you’re going to be alone for the rest of your life! It can be really encouraging to know that there are other singles out there. It can also be a lot of fun to spend time with them. There’s nothing quite like being around other singles who are also looking for a relationship. They are the people who actually get you. And you can be open and honest about your struggles, expectations, and feelings without being judged. Don’t underestimate the power of hearing what others have to say about something you’re experiencing. Although God always uses His Word to speak to us, He often will use people we are close to as well. Hearing how someone else is experiencing the same things as you can bring a lot of peace into the situation.

Just like it says in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12, “Two are better than one!” Going through your single season with other people who are going through it too will bring so much joy, peace, and fun to this time in your life. What’s even better is that these friends can help you keep your mind on what matters the most–your relationship with God, following His will for your life, and preparing for a healthy relationship when the time comes. And who knows, maybe one of the Christian singles you meet will eventually turn into something more. (God works in mysterious ways!) Plus, it’s a great way to make friends that you can lean on once your single season comes to an end.

Friendships are important in your single season, but they should also remain a priority once you start dating again. It’s essential to keep your friends close. Whether you’ve experienced it with one of your friends or you’ve done it yourself, ditching friends once you’re in a relationship happens. But it doesn’t have to be that way. When you focus on building amazing friendships during your single season, those people can be the support you need in your dating season too. They become your shoulder to lean on, your social media stalking BFFs that let you know whether or not the person is good enough for you. Those people are essential when you’re dating, but forming those meaningful relationships starts now, in your single season.

Practice Pursuing Peace: Take a moment to pray and ask God to reveal friendships to pursue during your single season. Write down the names of three people to focus on building friendships with. Or, write down three places you can go this week to meet new friends.

Scriptures: Philippians 4:4-8, Psalms 34:14

Pursue Peace in Your Single Season

If you genuinely want to experience peace, contentment, even JOY in your season of singleness, it’s possible. While it might feel easier to be lonely, question your worth, and worry that you’ll never find love, there’s no peace in that. To be at peace with this season in your life, you’re going to have to do what it says in Philippians 4:8 and think about whatever is true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or praiseworthy.

Experiencing peace has a lot more to do with your mindset than with anything else. The Bible tells us not to be anxious about anything, which includes your relationship status. Instead, give God your worries and tell Him your hopes for a relationship. When you get all of your desires, worries, fears, uncertainties, and hopes out of your mind, off your chest, and into God’s hands, you get something amazing in return: peace.

Hate to break it to you, but this isn’t a one-and-done transaction. As humans, we’re prone to worry and fear, so it’s natural for anxiety about your singleness to creep up time and time again. Fortunately, God is always willing and ready to hear your heart, take your worries, and provide you with a peace that surpasses all understanding.

You can also choose to pursue peace in your single season–to go after the things that bring joy, whether that’s meaningful friendships, opportunities aligned with your passions, or your relationship with Jesus. With instant access to the one and only source of true peace (Jesus!), you can have the best season of singleness anyone’s ever experienced! Start today with this prayer:

Dear Heavenly Father,

You created my inmost being and are well aware of my desire to be in a relationship. Please help me be patient as I trust your timing in this season of singleness.

God, I pray you would stir a fire in my heart to pursue You and Your will passionately and wholeheartedly. Please use this season of singleness to transform me from the inside out and lead me down the path You designed for my life. I pray for a greater sense of purpose and understanding of who You’re calling me to be. I ask for new opportunities, meaningful friendships, and lots of joy as I experience life without a partner right now.

I also pray you would mend any heartache I’m carrying from past relationships and prepare my heart and mind to date well when the time comes. Lord, give me the strength to set Christ-like boundaries and pursue relationships that honor and glorify You.

Thank you, God, for being a reliable source of peace and joy, even when I start to feel anxious or lonely. I know you are trustworthy and good and only want the best for me. I choose to trust your perfect timing and commit my hopes, dreams, plans, and desires to You.

In Jesus’ name, Amen.