Just Breathe: Hope And Help For Those Drowning In The Pain Of Addiction

Scripture: John 5:1-6

Blessed are the Broken  

I have learned the hard way that there is a big difference between being broken and being miserable. I have been miserable in my addictions and dysfunction a lot. Being miserable is being uncomfortable; it’s hating the circumstances; it’s being self-absorbed; it’s playing the victim; and it’s getting caught. Brokenness? That comes from a different place, and it’s the first step to finding the pathway to freedom because it’s brokenness that gets you to the place where you’re finally willing to admit that there is something broken in you—something that you can’t fix. There’s a deep realization when you figure out that your way is not the right way. That’s when you’re finally ready to cooperate and get well. 

When you’re truly broken, the biggest realization becomes: you can’t help youanymore. 

When I started to become familiar with the Bible, I really loved reading about Jesus and all of his encounters with people—people like me. 

In John, chapter 5, Jesus’ heart is filled with compassion for a guy who he miraculously heals. The man was physically broken. He had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. It’s an amazing story of hope and new beginnings, but this story contains what I’ve come to know as one of the most important questions for life and recovery. Before Jesus even touched the man, Jesus asked him, “Do you want to get well?” (John 5:6 NIV).  

When I first read that story, I thought that was a stupid question. But after years of my own stubborn refusal to change and working with all kinds of people who are living in denial, I’ve discovered that’s not a stupid question. It’s actually one of the most important questions we can ask ourselves. Sure, we are miserable, sick, know we have a problem, know things are out of control, but do we really want to get well? 

I can’t remember the exact moment that I finally decided that I did want to get well. I think it was somewhere between my chapped-lipped-white-powder-on-my-shirt-cocaine-bender trip to Vegas and that three-block drive to tell my sponsor everything I had ever done. And somewhere in there, by the grace of God, I was able to drop the fear and finally humble myself to the loving touch of Jesus, and he started healing me. I also got into a community of fellow strugglers where I encountered honest, loving people and a loving God who met me right where I was. Still, I never would have made it to that place without finally admitting that, on my own, I am a broken, shattered mess. 

If you will humbly embrace brokenness and allow God to go to work on the inside of you, if you will cooperate with him by working some steps, and if you will link arms with honest, fellow-strugglers, you will begin to get a handle on and actually overcome and break the chains of what binds you up and walk free.

Scriptures: Micah 6:8, Proverbs 16:18

Relinquish Control Part 1

What comes to your mind when you think of the word surrender? I used to always have negative images in my mind when I thought of that word, like it was kind of bad news. Like somebody getting slammed up against a police car or a wimpy guy giving up way too soon. But I’m learning that the true definition of surrender is to relinquish control to someone else. 

I like that definition. It describes that there is a choice of the person surrendering to “give up control.” True surrender isn’t a forced act. It’s not mindless, but rather a conscious choice to let go and give leadership to someone else—someone who is stronger, more capable, and more powerful than you and me. And it’s actually good news. Getting to a place of true brokenness—not just being miserable, but being broken—gets us to a place where we are ready to take the next key step: surrender. 

Can I tell you why it took me so long to surrender? There was this thing in me that kept me relying on my own power. EGO. We talk a lot about pride, self-centeredness, and ego in the twelve-step program because it’s the real root of our addiction. We remind one another of what EGO stands for: Edging God Out. We can get so full of ourselves that there’s no room for God. We start thinking, I really am the center of the universe. I think it’s why the Bible says that God detests pride; it keeps us from experiencing his love, his acceptance, his power, and his leadership, which he knows could change everything.  Humility is the key to recovery. We have to quit playing God and choose to surrender to his care and control. 

Scriptures: Mark 9:24, Psalms 130:7, Isaiah 43:2

Relinquish Control Part 2

Surrender begins with a willingness to believe that there is a God who is stronger than you. A God who is more powerful than you. A God who has the ability to rescue you and give you the power to breathe again. I’m learning that this simple willingness to believe changes the focus of your life. It begins to free you from the ever-tightening cycle of self-absorption and points you to help beyond your own inadequate strength. 

I’ve learned that if you are entirely ready to surrender your life and your will to the loving care and control of Jesus, then your sin, which is the really huge deal, will be forgiven, and you will start the process of becoming a new person who can walk free in the power and unfailing love of God. 

I’m learning that the greatness of a man or woman is determined by the measure of their surrender. When you surrender, God moves in, and you will finally have the right person in charge of your life and the right kind of power it takes to change. King Keith had to come down off the throne of his life and give God the control. I had to quit Edging God Out, had to drop my pride, and ask Jesus Christ to forgive my sin and lead my life. 

How he has changed my life! So much so, that it is my greatest joy to keep surrendering my life to him every single day because he is a God who loves me. Every night before I go to bed, I set the alarm on my phone, put it in my house shoe, and tuck it under my bed. What I’ve found is that this forces me to get on my knees every morning to pick it up and every night to put it back. I’m a slow learner and this little practice has helped me hit my knees. While I’m down there, I intentionally say morning and night, “My life is yours, Lord. I surrender. Do with me what you please.” As a result, I’m beginning to walk free. If you’ll choose to surrender and relinquish control, you can do the same. 

Scripture: Philippians 2:13

Evaluate my Life with Fearless Honesty Part 1

What’s the best gift you ever received as a kid for Christmas? A Play Station? An X-box? A Cabbage Patch Kid? A bike? A puppy? I remember one Christmas receiving a game called “Operation.” Remember that game? You get to play surgeon on this cartoon guy that is laid out on the board. You have to carefully remove various “organs” without touching the sensitive sides surrounding them. If you accidentally make a mistake, it makes a horrible buzzing noise that shocks you, his red nose lights up, and it’s “game over.” 

I’m learning through my recovery that one of the most valuable practices is to do little probing, a little dissecting, a little “self-exploratory” surgery. And when I say “self” exploratory, I’m not saying that this is a “self-help” type of step. We’ve already concluded that we are inadequate in our own strength. This step does take a deep journey into yourself, but you don’t do it alone. It involves your honesty, God’s diagnostic ability, and a trusted friend.

There are different ways that various recovery programs talk about this, but I’m learning that somewhere in the early stages of breaking free, you have to examine yourself with fearless honesty. In my twelve-step program we call it taking a “fearless moral inventory.” This is a huge inside out step. This has to do with coming clean, getting honest about the past, getting honest with the struggle, getting honest with God, taking off the mask, and telling ourselves and someone else the truth. 

Every retailer and every business knows the importance of inventory. You have to ask, “What’s in the store? What’s in the warehouse? How much is in the bank? How’s our stock doing? How’s employee morale? What’s really true about our situation right now?” Businesses that don’t do that? Well, they don’t usually last very long. 

And people who won’t do this step? Well, their recovery doesn’t usually last very long either. This is a journey to the center of the truth, and this is the step that God wants every single one of us to take. 

Scripture: Psalms 139:23-24

Evaluate my Life with Fearless Honesty Part 2  

I’m kind of a new football fan. I didn’t grow up playing sports, but my son is a little athletic guy so I’m learning so that I can hang with him. I’ve seen those NFL referees go to the replay monitor and take a closer look at the previous play. They’ll come back onto the field and announce, “After further review, the call on the field is confirmed.” 

It makes me think of how important it is for us to do that with God. It’s always a good idea to come to God and say, “Search me, O God. Let’s go to the replay monitor, rewind, and take a closer look at my character. I’d love to get your eyes on me, because you always make the right call. After further review, what do you see I need to work on?” 

God is for you as you do this process. His steady gaze of unfailing love will guide you as you do this. To begin this self-exploratory surgery, I suggest you get alone and grab a scalpel—just kidding. It might be better to grab a pen and a spiral notebook or maybe a laptop and sit down and recite Psalm 139:23–24.

Ask God to help you out. What’s the honest truth about me? What’s wrong in me? What do I feel guilty about and why? What kind of resentment and bitterness do I have rolling around in there? Point out the things I’ve done, no matter how painful it might be to see them. What are some character defects in me that need changing? God, I’m asking you to reveal me from the inside out. 

And he will. Better than any replay machine, any CAT scan, or MRI, you can expect him to bring to mind some things that you didn’t expect to come up. But that’s what you want. It’s about coming clean. 

Scriptures: Proverbs 28:13, 1 John 1:8, James 5:16

Evaluate my Life with Fearless Honesty Part 3

You can also expect something else to happen on this self-exploratory surgery. Just as you are discovering the truth about you, a cold front will start moving in and that old dark cloud called denial will try to blanket you and blind you to the things you need to expose to the light. And you’ll find yourself saying, Well, I guess that’s really not that big of a deal. I’m not really like that. I don’t need to write that down. I’m not letting go of that. You’ll mark through it, get the eraser going, or hit delete. 

Now, you can see why fearless honesty is needed. Because to go deep within yourself and be ruthlessly honest is not an easy deal. To get beyond denial is a constant battle and seeing the naked truth is not exactly a trip to the local Dairy Queen. 

But here’s the truth I’ve learned: the sin you want to conceal the most is the sin you need to reveal the most. And if the goal is getting well and walking free, then what’s the point of hiding stuff? 

Let me recommend that you get in a quiet, uninterruptible place where you can be still and think. Don’t rush this. If this is a new experience for you, you’ll need to set aside a large block of time. Pray the “Search me, O God” type prayer and start writing it down as God leads you. This process is about going after deep core character defects like selfishness, pride, envy, insecurity, approval seeking, greed, fear, worry, bitterness, unresolved conflict, and unresolved guilt. Deep stuff. Hidden stuff. God is more than able to bring that out. I know because he’s brought them to the surface in me. 

It’s also so helpful to get another person, a trusted friend, involved in this process. Sharing this list with my sponsor was one of the most, if not the most, powerful steps I took to find freedom. I never thought I would be able to bring that stuff to light with someone else and have them stick around long enough to listen. When I was able to share everything with my sponsor that I’d ever done, it felt like a thousand pounds fell off my shoulders. I actually didn’t lose any weight, but it sure felt like it! 

God wants us to do this together; we are all fellow strugglers on a grace journey. Find a trusted person who understands the value of what you’re doing. Confide in someone who is mature enough that they won’t be shocked or post your stuff on social media. Choose someone who knows the Lord well enough

Scripture: Acts 3:19

Make Amends Part 1

I used to watch the old TV sitcom The Andy Griffith Show. I’ll still see it occasionally pop up on one of those classic TV channels. When I would watch it, the guy I could relate to the most was Otis. Otis was the self-described “town drunk,” and he would stop by the sheriff’s office on a regular basis, walk right into a cell, and lock himself in to “sleep it off.” The funny thing was that they hung the keys up where he could reach them and leave at any time. 

I resonate with Otis because I have been Otis. Sometimes I have been so comfortable in my cell that I’ve forgotten that at any time I could walk out and be free. One of the things that keeps you and me locked up is a thing called bitterness. When you get honest with yourself and take that fearless moral inventory, you find that a lot of the emotion, the pain, the regret, the remorse, the anger, the disappointment, the guilt, and the shame stem from your interaction with—you guessed it—people.

Our responsibility in this step is to do our part to make things right with—you guessed it—people. It’s time to make amends or seek forgiveness from those you’ve hurt, and forgive those who have hurt you. 

Neither one of those things are easy. I remember when I made my list. It was complicated. I had to take a couple of road trips. I had to do research. I had to make embarrassing phone calls. I had to stand before tombstones and apologize. I had to stand before people in my shame and wear it, exposed and broken, and ask them to release me from the debt I owed them. But do you know what was amazing? In those moments, it was like chains were broken. It was like a forest that had been burned to the dirt was now sprouting up little seeds of life. I started seeing these people in a whole new way, and it was powerful. 

Even though it is freeing and powerful, it’s important to point out that this step—making amends and asking for forgiveness—is not about you. It is an act of humility. It’s about you doing whatever your part is to make things right with them. It’s about them hearing you own your own stuff, and not about getting anything in return. You do it, even if they don’t forgive you. Even if you can’t make all things right. Even if it doesn’t fix the relationship or make everything better. You just choose to humbly do it, because it’s the right thing to do, and the sheer act of it sets you free. 

Scriptures: Colossians 3:13, Job 21:23-25

Make Amends Part 2

There is another kind of amends that is important and powerful: learning to forgive those who have hurt you. I can’t tell you the number of horror stories I’ve heard from people in my recovery world life. Every one of them, including my own, points to some kind of relational breakdown. 

I used to say, “But they owe me! My parents hurt me bad; they owe me! Those kids at school owe me! My brother owes me! That old girlfriend owes me! That ex-spouse owes me! If I let them off the hook, it just wouldn’t be fair … they need to pay!” 

Then I read Colossians 3:13, which says that we owed God. He didn’t give us “fair.” He gave us his Son, and he paid the debt that our sins had racked up. So I “must” forgive others. I have to make amends.

But our human nature rears its ugly head, and we cry out for justice, for retribution. We get an adrenaline rush watching those movies where the really evil guy gets a payback. We are easily deceived into thinking that true release, real freedom, lies in revenge. It’s a lie that our enemy feeds us. And it’s a lie that keeps us from getting well. 

In fact, if you would do a “cost/benefit analysis” of bitterness, you would find that there is enormous cost and zero benefit. It wrecks you physically, emotionally, and spiritually.  It’s been my experience—and research backs up this assertion—a lot of people are sick or stay sick because of unresolved bitterness in their lives. It’s not so much what you eat but what eats you that will kill you. 

I’ve watched way too many people who refuse to let go of relational scars and wounds. They won’t give up their right to get even. They can’t let go of the past. And bitterness literally eats them alive. That’s a lousy way to live and die. 

So, how do you do extend forgiveness to those who have hurt you, especially if they didn’t ask? Start by inviting God to be involved. Grab a pen and some paper and you write down a prayer that might go something like this: “God, I want to thank you for your incredible kindness, patience, and grace toward me. I admit that I haven’t shown the same kind of grace toward those who have hurt me; instead, I have held onto my bitterness, my anger, my thirst for revenge, for way too long. So, I’m asking for your help right now. Please bring to mind all the people I need to forgive, so that I can do this right now.” 

Scriptures: Romans 12:17-19, Luke 23:34

Make Amends Part 3

As you prepare to extend forgiveness, let me tell you what I’ve learned forgiveness is not. Forgiveness is not forgetting. You really can’t forget everything. Hurts leave scars and sometimes even constant daily reminders because of the circumstances in which their actions have placed you. Forgiveness is not saying, “It’s no big deal.” It was a big deal. It hurt. Don’t minimize it or rationalize it. 

Forgiveness is not a feeling. Forgiveness is a choice, a decision of your will. You don’t wait until you feel like forgiving. It’s a decision to surrender to the authority and leadership of God. To do this is a step of obedience. Remember the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. 

I’m learning new stuff from the Bible every day of my life, like this one, “Never pay back evil with more evil. Do things in such a way that everyone can see you are honorable. Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone. Dear friends, never take revenge. Leave that to the righteous anger of God. For the Scriptures say, ‘I will take revenge; I will pay them back,’ says the Lord” (Romans 12:17–19). 

You need to give up your right to get even and let God deal with them. And don’t wait for the other person to ask for your forgiveness; there’s a little pride thing going on with that. You make the first move. Jesus, who was completely innocent, modeled that on the cross when he said, “Father, forgive them. They do not know what they are doing” (Luke 23:34 NLV). 

Compile your list and as you get to that first person, make the choice to forgive him or her for every painful memory that comes to your mind. You focus on that person until you are sure you have dealt with all the remembered pain. Release them to God and start working your way down the list. 

You say, God, I choose to forgive ____ for what they have done or failed to do, which made me feel ____. I choose not to hold on to this resentment anymore. Thanks for setting me free from the bondage of my bitterness. I give up my right to get even and ask you to heal my damaged emotions. 

Make amends. Choose forgiveness and walk out of the prison of bitterness.

Scriptures: Romans 12:2, Proverbs 23:7

Think a Whole New Way Part 1

There was a song about fifteen years ago by the pop/rock group Sister Hazel, where the lyrics rang out: “If you want to be somebody else; If you’re tired of fighting battles with yourself; … Change your mind.”  You know what? They were right. I’m learning that the real challenge to you and me being all that God wants us to be lies between our ears. 

Jesus told us that we have an enemy and even called him “the father of lies,” and that enemy wants to keep us locked up with guilt, shame, and worthlessness. He loves to see us wrestle with a tortured soul; the last thing he wants for you and me is freedom. So he targets the mind, and he knows that if he can get us to believe his lies, instead of God’s truth, he can keep us stuck. 

If you can influence thinking, you can influence behavior. Because the way we behave is always a reflection of the way we think. 

Romans 12:2 was a game-changer for me. “Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think” (NLT). It took me a couple times of reading this to understand, but it’s really important to see that there are actually two parts to this process of living a new way: God’s part and our part. 

God’s part is the transformation. Paul is saying that you have to let a power that is greater than you go to work on you because only he has the power to change you and me from the inside out. A friend told me that the Greek word used for “transform” in that Scripture is metamorpho. That word sound familiar? It’s where the word metamorphosis comes from, and I like that picture because a caterpillar can’t change himself into a butterfly on his own strength and power. Its job is to surrender to the process of change. That’s the way it is with us too. Transformation is God’s part. 

Scriptures: Colossians 2:7, Philippians 4:8

Think a Whole New Way Part 2

My part and your part in this transformation is changing the way we think. We have to renew our minds to a whole new way of thinking. My friend told me, “You can’t solve a problem with the same mind that created it!” You’ve got to change your mind. 

There are two words that have helped me do this: feed and focus. What you feed your mind will determine the release of your full potential. I’ve been trying to eat healthier. I’ve been working out and being more selective about what I put in my body. I’ve fed my body a lot of junk food through the years. But it’s nothing compared to the junk with which I used to feed my mind. 

If I am feeding my mind pornographic images, it does something to the way I view other people, and the way I see relationships. If I’m always thumbing through magazines looking at celebrities and those perfect bodies who live rich and famous lifestyles, it messes with my contentment factor, makes me insecure in my own skin, and skews my perspective on the importance of stuff. If I am feeding my mind with all the political nastiness on social media, it turns me into a cynical, joyless, and even hate-filled person. Whether it’s movies, books, music, conversations, or jokes, I have to be careful what I am constantly feeding my mind. My mind and your mind will be shaped by what we feed it. 

If you’ve read my story then you know that I ran as far as I could from God and his Word. But these days as I’ve been daily feeding my mind on God’s truth, I’ve been growing and God is producing some pretty cool fruit in my life. I’m learning that it is alive and life-changing. You really ought to try it. 

The reason to read the Bible is not to get extra credit from God or to gain more knowledge so you can smoke someone in a game of Bible Jeopardy. It’s so you can grow and produce good fruit with your life. So I encourage you to “Let your roots grow down into him” (Colossians 2:7). 

Scriptures: Colossians 2:7, Colossians 3:1-2

Think a Whole New Way Part 3

One of the practical ways I’ve learned to let my roots go down deep (Colossians 2:7) is to meditate on God’s truth. It’s a value in my twelve-step program and throughout God’s Word. When I say meditate I’m not talking about lighting some incense, getting in an awkward position, and humming. No, the old adage is, “If you can worry, you can meditate.” It’s just turning a thought over and over in your mind. As you do that, your mind is being fed much-needed truth and you develop new patterns of thinking. I’ve learned that you can’t think a bad thought and a good thought at the same time. One of them has to go, so replacing that negative thought with a new one begins to change the way you think. Feed and Focus. Feed and Focus. Feed and Focus.

Whatever you choose to focus on has your attention, and what has your attention has you. It’s like a golfer who steps up on the tee box and notices that there is water on the right. So in his mind he begins to think, Oh man, there’s water on the right. There’s water on the right. There’s water on the right. Where do you think he’s going to hit it? In the water on the right! 

Sometimes we say, Okay, then I’m not going to think about that. I’m not going to think about that. I’m not going to think about that. And while you are telling yourself to not think about that, what are you doing? Yeah, thinking about that! So, it’s not so much to resist, as it is to replace. You have to change your focus. Colossians 3 shares that we can actually change our focus, set our minds in a better place.

From experience, let me tell you that when you set your mind on yourself and when your focus is on earthly things—worldly stuff, chasing bling, popularity, and fame—the inevitable result is worry, anxiety, guilt, envy, greed, unhealthy competition, pride, lust, insecurity, fear, and discouragement. 

But when you “set your mind on things above” and when Jesus is your focus and you choose to move through your day with an others-centered focus like he did, then all that other junk gets replaced by hope, confidence, humility, love, laughter, patience, security, and unexplainable peace. 

Every day you can roll out of bed and say, God, today I again surrender my life to you. Keep me focused on your presence in my life today, all day. Help me listen well as you try to guard my reactions, my tone, my attitude, and my choices. May my thoughts be fixed on you. 

Scriptures: Luke 6:47-48, Ephesians 4:22-24

Think a Whole New Way Part 4

Surrendering our life to God is a big deal for many of us because we spent so many years with our minds fixed on everything but God, right? My friend told me once about his brother-in-law’s farm in Kentucky. He said that there was a path going from the barn to his main field. He could drive his tractor out of the barn, put it on that path, take his hands completely off the steering wheel, and it would go down that path and perfectly through the gate into the field. He said the reason his tractor could do that is because he had been up and down that path so many times that there were deep ruts in that road. All he had to do was get the tires aligned with the ruts, and it would automatically do its thing. 

Then my friend told me, “Keith, you’ve been driving in the same old ruts for thirty years; you need new ruts. You need new pathways, new patterns of thinking, new ways of coping, and new ways of reacting. You have to change your focus. Just feed and focus, feed and focus, and feed and focus.” 

So I’m learning that as you feed and focus, your way of thinking begins to change. And as your way of thinking begins to change, your way of behaving starts to change. And as your behavior starts to change, old habits start to die. And as old habits start to die, freedom starts to define your life, and real lasting inside out transformation starts to overwhelm you! 

So, let God metamorpho you into a new creation by changing the way you think. 

Scripture: Romans 8:28

Encourage Others with My Life and Story Part 1

My wife and I recycle. I think God wants us to be environmentally conscientious and take care of this planet, and there are lots of ways we are discovering to do that, whether it’s lower emissions from cars, alternate fuel sources, or energy efficient light bulbs. And I believe that God sets the example by the way he’s always been into recycling.  

In fact, God is consumed with recycling. While it’s true he does love the planet, he loves the people on it a million times more. And what he will do, if we’ll let him, is to take all the garbage from our lives—all the nasty, smelly trash and all the toxic waste—and recycle it into something good. 

Like those creative people who go to flea markets, garage sales, and the scratch and dent section of furniture stores and turn broken and scarred junk into something incredible, God is really, really good at making the old into new, the wasted into purpose, and the dead alive. He can recycle the pain and garbage in your life into an incredible story that could help someone else’s life. God not only wants to save you, forgive you, heal you, restore you, change you, and guide you … he wants to use you to bless others.

We all have amazing worth in God’s eyes. He created us, breathed life into us, and he put within every one of us a unique personality and unique gifts, so that we can make a difference in this world. Even though we can make a royal mess of our lives, if we will humble ourselves and let him go to work, God will recycle all that nasty stuff for good. No one is worthless. No one is useless. He wants to use your story to help other people. 

Scriptures: Ephesians 2:8-10, 2 Corinthians 5:17-18, 2 Corinthians 1:4

Encourage Others with My Life and Story Part 2

Having experienced a spiritual awakening, I must now step outside of myself and encourage others with my story and continually changing life. You don’t have to wait until you feel like you are completely there to be used by God. Let God use you as a person in process. 

You may be like me and not have a ton of great insight. You may not yet be able to offer the kind of counsel and wisdom as someone who’s further down the road than you. But you can say to people, “I’m not where I want to be, but I’m not where I used to be. God is changing me. He’s setting my feet on a new path, and helping me walk a new direction.” 

You know, there’s always a “so that” involved in transformation. Companies will make changes in their business, “so that … .” Teams will make changes in line-ups, personnel, or coaching staffs “so that … .” There is always a goal in mind. God does the same when he changes someone. 

Check out Ephesians 2:8–10. You can see that God planned to use my life and yours all along. But you maybe took a detour like me and did your own thing, but by his grace and power he brought you back. And he did it so that he could use your life to do the good things he’d always dreamed you would do.

I never imagined I would get to do something like write a book and talk to people about freedom. A former alcoholic, drug addict who was addicted to and distributed porn?

I’m telling you, from personal experience, if you will cooperate with the leadership of God, he can and will recycle all of your pain, your failures, your screw-ups, your dirty secrets, and your past into an unexpected ministry to help other people.

When you become broken, humble, dependent upon God, grateful for grace, and grateful for a second chance in life, then you become a real player in God’s redemptive plan. You become empathetic, compassionate, and understanding because you’ve been there. You know you’ve been forgiven much, so like Jesus said, now you are able to love much. You know how futile self-help is. You know how destructive bitterness is. You know how freeing forgiveness is. You understand the value of complete honesty. You know where to access real transformational power. You know what it takes to make the courageous choice to walk down a different path. You understand the power of feeding your mind and changing your focus. You are in the process of changing a little more every day, one day at a time. I mean, think about it. If you were God, isn’t that the type of person you’d want on your team? 

Scripture: Acts 20:24

Encourage Others with My Life and Story Part 3

I’m blown away by how many people God puts in my path that need the same kind of touch from him that I have received. You never know how God will use you. You never know when your story, no matter what it is, will intersect someone else’s life and give them hope. God has always used ordinary people, broken people. 

Please don’t misunderstand, people are helped immensely when we share from our strengths. But many more are helped when we’re also not afraid to be honest about our weaknesses, and the way that God is giving us the power to change. 

Who better to help someone struggling with alcohol or drug addiction than someone who’s been there?

Who better to help someone with an eating disorder than someone who’s been there?

Who better to help someone through the pain of abuse, unfaithfulness, bankruptcy, chemotherapy, the loss of a child or a miscarriage than someone who’s been there?

There is no more effective healer than a wounded healer: someone who’s been there. God never wastes a hurt! Never. If you are willing, he will take your pain and struggle and recycle it in such a way that your life will ripple on people in ways you never dreamed. 

Pray that God will intersect your life with other people. And then notice them. Never see them as an interruption, but as an answer to your prayer to help someone else. Seize the opportunity to humbly, tactfully, and graciously share what life is like now that you and God are walking this new road together. All you have to be able to say to help somebody else is, “The road is long, but with God’s help I’m getting there one step at a time. And I’d sure love to take you along with me. How about it?” 

As you share your story and as you encourage and mentor and coach and sponsor other people who are where you used to be, pretty soon you will feel as impassioned as Paul felt in Acts 20:24. 

If you’ve read my story, you know that I am a man who is recovering from materialism, lust, jealousy, resentment, gluttony, procrastination, lying, anger, inferiority, grief, heartbreak, gossip, malice, and more. But you also need to know that I am a man who has experienced the amazing grace, patience, power, and unfailing love of Jesus Christ in his life. He gave me a new start. He took out my cold, hard heart and gave me a new soft one. He gave me a new direction to walk and some new shoes to wear. He surrounded me with people to help me along the way. He is transforming me daily with the same power that raised Jesus from the dead. So as long as there is breath in my lungs, you will not get me to shut up about the kindness of God. It’s part of my recovery, and it’s part of yours. 

Grab someone who needs the hope you’ve found, and take up your mat and walk.