Do you feel trapped by lust? Does it seem like there’s no way out? This 3-day devotional plan gives you practical steps to gain victory over lustful thoughts, porn, and unwanted sexual behaviors. There’s hope. With biblical truth and brain science, you can overcome lust and experience true freedom.
Plan provided by Ben Bennett and Resolution Movement.
Day 1
Scriptures: Genesis 2:18, Genesis 2:21-25, 1 Corinthians 7:1-9
Sexual Desire Is Good and God-Given
God created sex. It was His idea. He created us in such a way that sexual activity releases neurochemicals in our brains, such as dopamine and oxytocin. Dopamine makes us feel good. Oxytocin promotes bonding. When people engage in sexual activity, they connect physically, emotionally, and relationally. That’s the way God designed us. Sex and sexual desire is God-given; it’s part of God’s beautiful design for our good.
Whether you are married or not, God created you with sexual desires. These desires are beautiful. And yet, what we do with them matters. How and when we seek to fulfill them matters. They were given to be fulfilled within a specific context that leads to His best for your life.
God created sex for the context of a loving, stable relationship: marriage. Genesis 2:24 says, “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh.” Marriage was given for procreation, pleasure, and companionship (Genesis 1:28, Proverbs 5:18–19, Ecclesiastes 9:9). God wants us to honor marriage and keep it undefiled (Hebrews 13:4a).
Maybe you’re single. Maybe you’re married, but your spouse isn’t interested in sex, or is ill, or away. You might feel unfulfilled, dissatisfied, or be so tempted to lust for any number of reasons, but that doesn’t change God’s design or His commands. It’s ok to honor your sexual desire and bless it, while bringing it under submission to God and His ways. While sex is God-given and beautiful, it is not ultimate. You actually don’t need it to survive.
No one knows us better or more intimately than our Maker. Our struggles with sin and temptation are not a surprise to Him. God sent His Son to set us free from sin’s power.We don’t have to give in to sin. We can go to Jesus and reliable people to find help, acceptance, and encouragement. We can grow. We can learn how to seek true and lasting fulfillment.
God, You know my thoughts, desires, dreams, and longings. Help me to honor you with my life.
Day 2
Scriptures: Ephesians 5:3, Psalms 145:14-21
Lust Is Often a Symptom of Deeper Things
For over a decade, I watched porn. I desperately wanted to stop but didn’t know how or why I repeatedly went back to it. Then, I learned that porn makes false promises. It says it can make us feel loved and accepted, but it can’t meet our deepest longings. It can’t love us back. It objectifies people. Often, it is not created consensually and desensitizes us to abuse. It provides a distorted view of sex. It’s addictive. Porn rewires our brains.
Porn, masturbation, and lustful thoughts can be difficult to stop because over time, repeated patterns of thought and behavior lead to fixed neurological pathways in our brains, similar to what we call muscle memory. Over time, it becomes easier to repeat the same unhealthy patterns. But even when it feels like giving in is inevitable, like your patterns of thought are so ingrained,it’s not too late. Those fixed patterns in your brain can be rewired leading to new pathways. Maybe you were filled with lust, but you stopped yourself from seeking porn—that’s a big win. Large victories are often the product of many smaller ones. Don’t give up.
Everyone experiences sexual arousal. We were created as sexual beings. But we are often most susceptible to sexual sin when we are hungry, angry, lonely, or tired. We are susceptible when our deeper longings are going unmet or have been outright rejected. See, God created us with legitimate longings—such as the desire for love, acceptance, and safety—that are intended to be fulfilled in relationships. When those longings go unmet, we can develop unhealthy ways of attempting to have them fulfilled. For example, when you feel rejected by people, criticized, or left out, you may find yourself wanting to dwell or sexual thoughts as it temporarily provides pseudo-acceptance or an escape.
In addition, you need to know what triggers your sexual desires. Your triggers may include locations, such as the gym. They may include social media, tv shows, movies, books, or songs. They can include sensations, body types, personality types, and emotions. What’s arousing varies from person to person. Our experiences can lead us to associate certain things with sexual desire. For example, someone who begins to masturbate as a way to escape feelings of anger or rejection may become aroused in the future when those feelings are triggered.
Learning to explore the deeper unmet longings behind lust will help you discover what you are truly longing for and how to have it fulfilled by God and others. In addition, having a plan of what you will do when you are triggered will help you begin to experience change.
God, it can feel overwhelming to battle temptation. Give me the wisdom to recognize my unmet longings and to seek Your help when I am struggling. When I feel weak, give me strength.
Day 3
Scriptures: Ecclesiastes 4:9-10, 1 Corinthians 6:18-20, 1 Thessalonians 4:3-7, Romans 12:2
Get Help from God and Others
Don’t go it alone. In your struggle with lust, porn, and unwanted sexual behaviors, get helpand encouragement from Christian friends.This is a non-negotiable strategy for overcoming lust. You need a person or two to whom you can confess your struggles and who will help you remember you have been forgiven. You need someone you can call or text and tell you are struggling. Learn to reach out rather than act out. Doing this changed everything for me personally. A lifestyle that says no to secrets can’t sustain the many lies lust needs to stay intact.
Pursue mutual support and accountability.A practical step you can take is to obtain a web filter that blocks certain sites and sends the addresses of sites you visit to one or two friends.This internet accountability is a powerful tool to help you guard your eyes and mind.
Depending on the depth of the struggle, it can be wise to seek professional help as well. A pastor, a counselor, or someone with training in sexual addiction can help us deal with deep-rooted patterns.For example, John felt he had uncontrollable lust for women who gave him lots of attention. He never knew why until he explored childhood traumas with a counselor. He realized that his father never approved of him, but his mother was nurturing, accepting, and safe. When John realized that he had sexualized his deeper longing for safety, he began to seek healing for his hurt, remind himself of his deeper reasons for the temptation, and seek safety in God and close friends.
Seek God, who alone has the supernatural power to help you. Rely on Him throughout the day. Make a plan to spend rich and satisfying times with Him. Read His Word. Memorize and meditate on Scripture passages.
Honoring God with your sexual desires is a commitment. Commit to standing your ground at the edge of your territory. Don’t settle for anything less. Don’t tolerate anything that is questionable or marginal. Start today. Implement just one strategy that will help you move ahead. Just keep at it, step-by-step, and depend on the Holy Spirit to help you.
God, what action can I take today? Who can I call on to aid me in this struggle? Help me to build new habits and establish safe and healthy relationships. I want my life to glorify You.