Start Over: Help and Hope for Your New Beginning

Scripture: Ephesians 3:14-20

Starting over isn’t easy, huh?

Sometimes, I struggle with starting over because I have a ton of regret and grief over what happened in the past. I wonder if I’ll be able to escape the pain.

Other times, I’m so excited to get beyond something hard and start over. I’m secretly hoping that the future isn’t as frustrating as the past. “Please, God, make what’s next better!”

Yet, on some occasions, I’m sad to start over because I really like what I was doing or what was happening. I don’t really want to start over because I’m afraid the best is in my rear-view mirror and not out of my front windshield.

Whether you’re excited to start over, scared, or somewhere in between, I hope to spend the next five days encouraging and equipping you to embrace your opportunity to begin again.

The first piece of good news I want to share with you is pretty simple – none of us has mastered this thing called life. Ernest Hemingway once made an observation about writers. He said, “’We are all apprentices in a craft where no one ever becomes a master.”

Hemingway was spot-on when it came to the craft of writing, but I think his words can also be applied to the art of living. No one ever masters life. As followers of Jesus, we don’t master the art and craft of discipleship. Every day, we’re hopefully making mistakes, learning, and growing up into the people God made us to be.

I know you may be discouraged when you think about the fact that you’re always going to be making mistakes, starting over, and beginning again in your life with God. But, this truth makes me excited, because when I open the Bible, I find that God has a vision for me that is better than my plans for myself. Unlike me, God is always able to make His plans into reality.

In the book of Ephesians, after sharing some incredibly exciting things about the plans of God that are being revealed, Paul shares his prayer for the church. In the middle of that prayer are two things I want you to consider as you start again.

“And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is. May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully…Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.”

Did you catch those two truths?

God’s love for you is beyond your ability to understand and God’s plans are beyond your ability to ask.

No matter what you’ve done in your past and where you’ve been, God’s love is greater than those things. Paul prayed for those who read his letter to experience that love, even if they might never be able to understand it fully.

But, Paul doesn’t stop there. He goes on to say that God is able to accomplish through us more than we can ask or think. You’ve got a pretty good imagination and you can ask God for a lot. But bigger than your imagination and longer than the list of your requests is God’s ability to work in and through you.

So, as you start over and you continue with this plan, I want to encourage you. Don’t settle for small dreams. Don’t make safe plans. You are loved beyond your imagination and God’s glory is beyond your comprehension.

Tomorrow, we’ll dive into our past and learn what God’s voice sounds like as we learn from where we’ve been.

Scriptures: Romans 7:15-24, Romans 8:1-2

When it comes to starting over, what is your biggest struggle today?

Is it letting go of the past?

Is it having hope for the future?

Is it beating yourself up in the present?

One of the reasons I wrote this devotional plan was I’ve struggled to start over in my life. Right now, I’m thinking of several occasions when I needed to begin again and move forward but I remained stuck for weeks and months. In one area of my life, I couldn’t start over for years!

If you’re struggling to start over, then I want to ask you to consider an important area to explore. That area is the way you relate to God.

Did you know that what you believe about God determines how you treat yourself? A.W. Tozer famously wrote, “The most important thing about you is what you think about when you think about God.” I agree with Tozer, but I also like to apply what he said specifically. If we think about God in certain ways, we find ourselves stuck in mental and emotional loops where we beat ourselves up and shame ourselves for what happened in the past or what hasn’t happened yet in our lives.

I took some courageous steps forward in my career about ten years ago. I started to feel some momentum, but then I got dealt a big dose of rejection. So, I gave up. I told myself that the opinions of a few people I’d encountered were the absolute truth about me and then I settled for a lesser view of myself and a smaller version of my calling.

The voice in my head was a critical, shaming, and condemning voice. That’s how I spoke to myself in this particular area and frankly, that’s how I felt God spoke about me.

Yet, that isn’t the way God speaks to us. God doesn’t speak with condemnation. We learn this from the experiences of the second most famous person in the New Testament.

The Apostle Paul wrote about his ongoing struggle to do what he wanted to do. Famously in Romans 7, Paul noted that the good he wants to do he doesn’t do and the things he doesn’t want to do, he finds himself doing again. He cried out, “What a wretched man that I am. Who will save me?”

Paul feels like he failed. He needed to start over again, but his view of himself was self-condemnation. The beauty of the Bible is that we see what God is truly like in Romans 7-8. Romans 8 begins with a strong declaration of how God responds to our failures to do what we want to do. “Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”

The voice of God is never condemnation in the lives of those who’ve embraced His grace! As we see in the Parable of the Prodigal Son, the response of God to His children coming home in need of a new beginning is compassion.

As you start over, what you believe about God is going to determine how you treat yourself. Perhaps part of this season of new beginnings is a new understanding of God based on what you read in the Bible.

God wants us to learn from where we’ve been. However, God is not interested in condemning and rejecting us for those failures.

This is a reminder I need whenever I start over so that I don’t get stuck in shame and self-condemnation.

Tomorrow, as you continue to step forward in the area where you are starting over, you’ll learn how God’s grace and your efforts fit together beautifully!

Scriptures: 1 Corinthians 15:10, Philippians 2:12-13, Lamentations 3:22-23

We all have preferences.

My wife prefers her food not to touch, especially at holiday meals. However, I figure since it’s all going to be together in my body, what difference does the stuffing touching the turkey make?!

The challenge of preferences often leads us to consider certain items as black-and-white, or this-or-that propositions when the truth has more nuance and tension to it.

As a pastor, I’ve spent almost 20 years of my life encouraging and supporting people who are starting over and beginning again. Over that time, I’ve noticed a consistent theme, which is the interplay between grace and effort. Some people focus on what they need to do, while others focus on what they need to believe. Some people believe the difference is the grace of God at work, while others believe the true power comes from their hard work and discipline.

These two realities – God’s grace and man’s effort – are the source of centuries of writing, debating, and diverging among followers of Jesus. The tension between these two elements is perfectly embodied by the words of the Apostle Paul in his first letter to the Corinthians. “But by the grace of God I am what I am, and his grace toward me was not in vain. On the contrary, I worked harder than any of them, yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me.” (1 Corinthians 15:10 CSB)

All too often, we put grace and effort at odds with one another. But, here in 1 Corinthians 15, we see how grace and effort danced with each other in Paul’s life. No one’s story is more unexplainable without grace than Paul’s, yet no one’s life required more discipline and grit than his.

In this verse, Paul acknowledged that he cannot explain who he is without the grace of God. Yet, he also said he worked harder than anyone else. To add even another layer to this incredible truth in tension, he states that the only way he was able to work that hard was the grace of God sustaining him.

When we start over, we are embracing the grace of God. During a past attempt or in a season that has been completed, we fell short of our goals or God’s standard. We have learned, grown and we’re ready to begin again. The chance to try again is in and of itself a gift. Every new beginning is an expression of God’s grace. In Lamentations 3, Jeremiah used the sunrise as a metaphor for God’s reservoir of mercy being renewed.

All too often in the church, we’ve heard messages that pit grace and effort against each other. Dallas Willard spoke to this problem powerfully when he wrote, “Grace isn’t opposed to effort; grace is opposed to earning.”

When we begin again, we’re receiving a gift from God that we have not earned. As with all gifts, earning has no place in the conversation. However, the steps that will follow our new beginning will require tremendous effort.

If you’re beginning to rebuild a relationship, the path you’re embarking on will stretch you in every conceivable way (and in some ways you cannot even imagine today).

If you’re beginning to pursue a new goal, you will need to embrace daily practices that run counter to the weakness of your flesh and the temptations you’ll face.

If you’re beginning a season of sobriety, you’re embracing the freedom Jesus purchased for you on the cross, even as you stand firm and resist the temptation of your past addiction.

So, as you start over, remember – grace isn’t opposed to effort. Grace is opposed to earning. You did not and cannot earn the love of your Heavenly Father. You didn’t earn this new beginning. It’s a gift.

Stewarding this gift and embracing your new beginning is going to take effort. And I look forward to helping you know the secret to that effort in tomorrow’s devotional. Can’t wait to share more with you then!

Scripture: John 15:1-8

Ten years ago, my wife and I took a trip for our anniversary. The cute little bed and breakfast we stayed in offered us a free wine-tasting card. As young parents of a toddler, we stretched every bit out of that free card!

At one particular winery, we were offered a tour with a brilliant and patient guide. I asked him a zillion questions and gained tremendous insight into the significance of what Jesus taught in John 15 where Jesus said, “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.”

That day, the guide told me that though I saw water lines along the vines, the vineyard did its best to water the vines as little as possible. “We make our vines chase the water in the ground. As the water comes through the roots in the ground rather than a sprinkler, the vine grows stronger and produces better grapes for wine purposes.”

Similarly, according to Jesus, the fruitfulness of our efforts only comes as we remain connected to Him like a grape branch is tied into the life of the vine. This means the secret of our success during a new beginning is not in our willpower, but rather in our enduring connection to Him.

The word “remain” or “abide” is an English translation of the Greek word “meno.” This word appears eleven times in John 15 and forty times in John’s Gospel overall. The dictionary definition for meno is “an inward enduring personal communion.” It is obvious to me that it was incredibly important to Jesus that we remain in Him. I love how my friend and fellow author, Steve Carter, applies this idea. He says, “Keep the main thing the remain thing.”

In your new beginning, you’re going to go to great effort to move forward. There will be days when you say “yes” or “no” because what you want now pales in comparison to what you want later. There will be moments when you work long hours or continue pressing forward when it would be easier to give up. You may open your Bible, show up to a therapy session, or close your eyes to pray, while asking yourself, “Will this make any difference?”

Just as it was impossible for me to see immediate changes as I stared at those grape vines, it may be impossible to see immediate changes from where you stand today. But just because you don’t see it, doesn’t mean it’s not happening.

I believe God is at work in the middle of your new beginning. As we read on Day 1, He is capable of exceedingly more than you ask or imagine in your life. The impact of your efforts, actions, disciplines, and practices is completely dependent on your ability to “keep the main thing the remain thing.”

Sure, it would be easier if God removed the struggles and difficulties you’re facing today. But God’s goal is not for you to have it easy. As Jesus said, His goal is to bear a large volume of fruit in your life. “This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be my disciples.” God can use the difficulty in your life to build an enduring communion with you personally.

The secret to your efforts as you start over is remaining in Him. What you’re seeking to do in this season of your life matters and it’s bigger than you can accomplish on your own. So, I’m praying for you to do all you can to remain in Him.

I’m excited for the final day in this reading plan tomorrow, where I’ll share how your approach to prayer can set you up for discouragement or hope.

Scriptures: 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, Luke 18:1, Psalms 116:1-2

Does anyone else get frustrated when their prayers don’t get immediately answered?

Me too.

My prayers are desperate when I’m starting over because I don’t want to repeat the pain of the past and I don’t want to deal with any more regret in the future. I long for God to move powerfully in this present moment as I begin again.

Truthfully, I’m coming to God with an ASAP attitude – “God, please give me what I want as soon as possible. This is important and it’s super urgent!” But, like you, I often find my prayers taking longer to be fulfilled than I want.

It’s this struggle that author Mark Batterson speaks about in a way that convicted me.

“I don’t want easy answers or quick answers because I tend to mishandle the blessings that come too easily or too quickly. I take the credit or take them for granted. So now I pray that it will take long enough and be hard enough for God to receive all of the glory. Change your prayer approach from ‘as soon as possible’ to ‘as long as it takes.’”

Perhaps this is why the Bible reminds us to pray in an enduring way.

In 1 Thessalonians 5, Paul tells his brothers and sisters to pray continually.

In Luke 18, Jesus tells His followers to pray always and never give up.

In Psalm 116, David speaks about his persistent prayers resulting from God bending to listen to him.

I wonder what would happen if we followed Batterson’s counsel and switched our prayer approach from “as soon as possible” to “as long as it takes.” What would it look like if we did what Jesus said and refused to give up in prayer?

We’d probably be more patient and persistent. We would have different expectations and be slower to get frustrated. We’d get comfortable waiting!

Sure, we’d all like our prayers answered ASAP. That would be easier, simpler, and cleaner. But what if what we need takes longer to happen? What if we have some growing, and transforming to do ourselves in the meantime? I think some of my prayers have been answered very slowly because I had to change and become the kind of person who was ready for those outcomes to happen.

Is it possible God needs to prepare you to become the kind of person who can receive the thing you’re praying for and longing to see happen?

Like the legend of the man who stopped digging just before he found the gold he’d been promised was in that very location, many of us give up praying before we experience a breakthrough or a blessing.

As you start over, I want to encourage you to start praying and keep praying. Shift your attitude from ASAP (as soon as possible) to ALAIT (as long as it takes). If Paul was correct when he said God is capable of more than we can ask or imagine, then what God has for us is worth the wait. While we’re waiting, God is always working.

Whether you’re starting over in life or setting goals for a new year, I pray that the last five days have been an encouragement to you.