The 7 Roots Of Anger

Scripture: Genesis 3:12-13

The roots of a person’s anger can run very deep. Anger’s history can reveal a lifelong struggle to overcome resentment, bitterness, and hostility. And the reasons for a person’s anger may or may not be justified. In this reading plan, we’ll uncover seven roots of anger that I invite you to explore for yourself and submit to deep consideration and prayer.

Root 1 — Blame & Shame

Who was the first person in the Bible to get angry?

When I ask that question, most people reply, “Cain.”

Without a doubt, he was a very angry man. But I don’t believe Cain is the first person in the Bible who got angry.

Consider carefully what happened in the Garden of Eden. Adam found himself married to the most beautiful woman imaginable. His life was paradise. He had a close relationship with God, ruled over creation, and enjoyed constant renewal of life. Then one day, he took a bite of a forbidden fruit and his entire world came crashing down. He was cast out of the garden and became destined to work by the sweat of his brow until the day he died.

Could it be possible Adam was more than a little angry with the woman? Absolutely. How do I know that? Because he blamed Eve for what happened to them. When God confronted him in the garden, Adam responded, “The woman whom You gave to be with me, she gave me from the tree, and I ate” (Gen. 3:12). 

The blame game finds its roots in anger. Ashamed and not wanting to take responsibility for what he’d done, Adam lashed out and placed the blame on Eve. And it’s a pattern that continues to this day.

For Eve’s part, she was also angry. When God confronted her about what she did, Eve played the blame game, too: “The serpent deceived me, and I ate” (Gen. 3:13).

Blame is easy … taking responsibility is hard.

Anger is easy … self-control is hard.

Externally, we may become angry with others who tempt or entice us to do something morally wrong or against our better judgment. And we might get angry when someone lies or preys upon our vulnerability or weakness.

Internally, we may become angry with ourselves for being gullible, buying into a lie, or participating in a sinful act—even though we knew it was wrong. We blame ourselves and often feel shame—living disgraced, dishonored, unworthy, or embarrassed in our own minds. 

But God wants us to know there’s a better way to react. When we’re assured of our relationship with Him, we can take responsibility for our own actions and not fall into the “blame game” trap—whether blaming ourselves or others. And when we accept his forgiveness for our sins and extend that same forgiveness toward others, blame and shame have no power over us.

Scriptures: Exodus 2:11-12, Matthew 26:52

Root 2 — Pride

Most people are born with a desire to be number one. It’s been part of our human nature since Adam and Eve rebelled against God in the Garden of Eden and introduced sin into the world.

Babies cry as a demand to be fed in their first hours of life. As they grow, they learn that crying and throwing tantrums “works”—it’s a way to have their desires met. The sad truth is, some people are still throwing tantrums even when they’re 20, 40, 60, or 80 years old. Why? Simply because they still want their own way. They want whatthey want when they want it, regardless of another person’s needs or feelings. Pride is their driving force. 

Any time a person doesn’t get what he deeply desires, anger is likely. Whether it’s jealousy, envy, greed, losing something closely tied to his identity, or being denied something he truly believes he needs, anger tends to be the result when things don’t “go his way.”

But no one can have his or her way at all times and in all situations. Many people become angry when they don’t have control over a desired situation or individual. And the anger of some can spin out of control when they realize they cannot and will not have control over God.

There are many examples of pride-related anger found throughout the Bible. Let’s take a look at a few:

• Moses—The first time we see Moses angry is when he kills an Egyptian soldier who was beating a Hebrew slave (Ex. 2:11-12). He ended up fleeing for his life and remaining on the back side of the desert for decades—until God called him to return to Pharaoh’s court and deliver the children of Israel out of bondage and into the Promised Land.
• Saul—This first king of Israel frequently displayed anger, especially toward David.  Saul tried to kill David by throwing a javelin at him—twice. He ordered him murdered in his bed, and later, he pursued the future king relentlessly into some of the most remote regions of Israel. All this was done in a jealous rage rooted in King Saul’s perception that David was trying to seize control of his kingdom. 
• Peter—In the New Testament, Peter cut off the ear of a temple guard in the Garden of Gethsemane. The apostle was angry that Jesus was being arrested, but the Lord immediately said to him, “All those who take up the sword shall perish by the sword” (Matt. 26:52). 

Time and again, God’s Word reveals that His people displayed anger in ways that didn’t produce good results. In fact, their bitterness, hostility, and rage resulted in rebuke or negative consequences for them and sometimes for the people around them. Most of these examples are related directly to pride and their desire to have things done their way.

Scripture: Psalms 143:8

Root 3 — Insecurity

The more insecure people are, the easier it is for them to feel anger. Why? Because insecurity is often related to feelings of low self-worth that come from: 

• Rejection
• Fears (especially fear of loss)
• Disappointment
• Feelings of inadequacy

Not everyone who has these feelings becomes angry, but many people do. They blame themselves. They blame others. They feel shame. A deep inner frustration develops that takes the form of anger. And, as stated previously, when the person begins to act out based on his or her emotions, the results are almost always negative.

Insecure people have difficulty establishing good, lasting relationships. They simply can’t see how they could add value to anyone else’s life. Also, lack of confidence can cause some people to withdraw from others, which can easily be mistaken for anger or an act of arrogance. 

After a while, insecure people typically get angry. When they go so long feeling so poorly about themselves, they start to resent the success and happiness of others.

Can you see how something as subtle as a lack of confidence can have a debilitating effect on one’s life? Don’t allow such devastation to affect you or your relationships with others. Pray for the ability to recognize areas of self-doubt. Then, begin taking control today by asking the Lord to heal any insecurities and resulting anger you may have.

Scripture: Hebrews 12:14-15

Root 4 — Dreams Deferred or Denied

I once knew a man who dreamed of becoming a medical doctor. He studied hard through elementary and high school, making excellent grades. But when the time came for him to go to college, his father refused to help. Instead, he was forced to stay on the family farm and work. Times were tough, money in short supply, and this young man felt he must obey his father’s demands.

At the age of 23, this man had enough of farm life. He packed his belongings, loaded his car, and drove away—taking with him a heart full of bitterness and resentment toward his father. For the rest of his life, he held to his anger and blamed his father for the loss of his dream.

As the years passed, this man allowed few people to get close to him. The bitterness he held inside spilled onto every relationship he developed, so he was constantly coping with feelings of rejection and isolation. He moved from job to job, unable to settle down or succeed in his work.

Finally, he met a woman who genuinely cared for him. After a short engagement, they married. Three weeks into the marriage, an unexpected explosion of anger nearly ended all affection his bride felt toward him. She didn’t leave him, but she cringed at his violent temper. Most of her friends refused to come to their home—they simply couldn’t tolerate being in the presence of a person so filled with anger and bitterness.

This man held to his rage until the end of his life. Even when he was senile and unable to care for himself, the poisons of resentment and bitterness continued to eat away at him. The longer he held to his anger, the hotter it burned inside him.

I’d love to tell you this man had an amazing spiritual healing and became a person filled with joy and peace. But that wasn’t the case. He died a bitter, angry person.

I don’t know all the reasons why this man’s father wouldn’t let him leave the farm. Maybe he was threatened by his son’s intellect or educational goals. Maybe he was selfish, not wanting to lose a farmhand. What I do know with certainty is that none of the reasons were justified in his son’s mind. The son no doubt felt justified in his anger. But let me ask you, “Who suffered the most through those years?” It certainly wasn’t the father.

It was the son.

We must remember that when we hold to our anger and bitterness, our entire lives will suffer their poison.

Scripture: Galatians 6:7

Root 5 — Lies & Cover Ups

Have you ever been angry when you found out someone was talking negatively about you? Perhaps it was a rumor attacking your character or tarnishing your good name. How did you feel? How much time and energy did you spend being angry with someone over something that was never true in the first place? Or, if what was said was true, how much time and energy did you waste railing against the rumor rather than addressing the truth and making the changes necessary to live a godly life?

I once heard about a man accused of bad behavior in his dealings with various staff members who worked at the country club where he was a member. He was on the club’s board of directors and took it upon himself to make certain that some jobs were done solely because he thought they needed to be done—it was “his way or the highway.”

When his bullying behavior came to light and the results were calculated in terms of money wasted, he was asked to resign. The board intended for the matter to be dealt with privately, hoping to protect members’ personal friendships with this man and his family.

However, his wife, believing he’d been treated unfairly, jumped to his defense. Before long, the entire club knew what had happened. Sides began to be taken over who was right and who was wrong. The wife openly, and in detail, described all the ways she thought her husband had been wronged. 

In their mutual anger, the man and his wife decided to sell their club membership. Their hasty and noisy departure meant their children would no longer be included in the activities of the other young people who’d become their friends. It also meant the couple would no longer have contact with their friends. Needless to say, they left a lot of hurt feelings in their wake.

This happened in a small city. As such, many of their friends at the club were also their friends at church. Feeling they could no longer associate with the club or its members, the couple uprooted their family and left the only church their children ever attended. And when this man tried to join another club, his application was denied after the reasons behind his departure from the previous club came to light. Behavior rooted in anger led this family to a steep decline.

In the months that followed, the wife who’d stood by her husband in denial and anger was forced to face the truth about his control and anger issues. The very things she’d believed couldn’t be true were true and behaviors once considered unthinkable were present and pervasive. When the truth finally came to light, this woman and her children were emotionally devastated—and without the support of their closest friends.

What’s the lesson here?

Anger based on rumors, partial truths, or full-blown lies can take you down a long, dark road of disappointment, frustration, and heartache. Confronting the truth may be painful, but always remember the alternative can be far worse.

Scriptures: Isaiah 41:10, Isaiah 53:4-5, Philippians 4:19

Root 6 — Brain Dysfunction

A root of anger that’s more common than many people realize is brain dysfunction or mental illness.

Brain dysfunction may be the result of a degenerative disease or an accident. Or the brain may function improperly due to a chemical imbalance present from birth that may manifest itself as mental illness. It may even be self-inflicted through alcohol and drug use.

We’re wise to recognize that some people have lost the ability to control their anger as a result of an accident, injury, disease, or addiction. Any one of these things can destroy brain cells or compromise brain function.

For example, many war veterans who’ve been wounded physically or traumatized emotionally have angry outbursts that are far more automatic than intentional. Certain types of dementia can also bring about negative personality changes and increased anger. Dealing with anger as a result of brain dysfunction or mental illness is extremely difficult in marriage, friendship, and work relationships.

Hope in these situations lies in the peace and healing power of God. The person can do very little for himself. Those who care for and love him need tremendous support from family members and friends. At all times, we must remember God is at work and is healing the person in ways that may not be visible to us but are nonetheless real.

While my heart aches for people in these situations, I choose to believe for their healing as long as they’re alive. The truth is, God can heal any disease or condition—and ultimately, He’s in control. He may not heal the person this side of heaven, but healing will come. Of that I’m certain. And until the healing occurs, I choose to continue believing for God’s best, not only in the life of the individual who’s suffered injury or disease but also for those supporting that person.

In many cases, it’s the caregivers of the person—perhaps a spouse or adult child—who experience the great miracle of healing and personal growth. Caregivers may find God resolving certain issues in their lives and bringing important changes in their attitudes and behaviors. We must never underestimate or devalue the Lord’s faithfulness to fulfill His will, plan, and purpose for each person involved in a brain-injury or brain-disease situation.

If the brain dysfunction is the result of something a person did to himself—whether accidentally or intentionally—there may be a need to forgive. This can be very difficult, especially if the person’s actions left him brain-damaged and filled with anger. Whatever the cause, forgiveness is vital. Ask God to help you forgive, to give you a loving heart for the person, and to bless you with the daily strength and patience needed to provide the level of care you can provide.

Scripture: 1 Samuel 25:35-37

Root 7 — Chemical Addiction

Even as we consider brain dysfunction, we’re wise to recognize that certain chemicals are poison to the brain. Alcohol is one of them. A number of other drugs and medications are toxic to the brain when used in great quantity or over great lengths of time.

Most people are familiar with the term “mean drunk.” Some individuals become increasingly angry the more alcohol they consume. If you’re the victim of an angry outburst from a person who’s consumed too much alcohol or drugs, the best thing you can do is walk away. Don’t try to argue or reason with the person. You’ll not be successful. And in the end, you may be injured physically or psychologically if you remain in the person’s presence. 

The Bible tells the story of a rich man named Nabal who owned many sheep and goats. It was customary in his day to reward self-employed and self-appointed vigilantes who protected flocks from thieves. Before he became king, David led such a band of men. The owners of the livestock usually compensated those who’d protected their investment at the time the sheep were sheared. David sent some of his young men to Nabal to collect what was owed them, but the rich man refused to give them anything. When David heard this, he was furious and set off with 400 armed men to destroy Nabal and all he owned.

But Nabal’s wife, Abigail, intervened. Without her husband’s knowing it, she packed food and provisions for David and his men. She went to humbly ask him to refrain from shedding blood, called him to remember his position before the Lord, and begged him not to do anything that might damage his reputation or ability to rule in the future. David received her gifts and responded to her plea, “Go up to your house in peace. See, I have listened to you and granted your request” (1 Sam. 25:35).

Abigail returned home to find Nabal hosting a lavish feast and appearing “very drunk” (1 Sam. 25:36). We learn more about Abigail’s wisdom when Scripture explains, “She did not tell him anything at all until the morning light” (1 Sam. 25:36). She waited until “the wine had gone out of Nabal” (1 Sam. 25:37), and then she told him what David had intended and what she’d done to avoid bloodshed.

Might I heartily recommend Abigail’s approach if you must deal with someone who’s drunk, an alcoholic, or a person high on drugs. Remember, there’s absolutely nothing to be gained from alcohol or drug use. But there’s so very much to lose. If you or someone you love has a problem with drugs or alcohol, ask God to help you seek help and overcome it today.

Scripture: Genesis 1:1

Anger’s Link to Other Emotions & Factors 

Anger has a way of linking itself to many other emotions—with the end result almost always negative. Consider these combinations:

Anger + Hatred = Rage

Anger + Bitterness = Revenge

Anger + Worry = A Divided Mind

Anger + Confusion = Turmoil/Indecision

Anger + Insecurity = Manipulation/Control Tactics

Anger + Stress = Physical, Mental, or Emotional Breakdown/Burnout

Anger + Resentment = Retribution

Anger + Fear = Irrational Response

Anger + Sorrow = Disorientation/Inability to Function

Certainly these aren’t all the combinations possible between anger and other emotions. And these aren’t the only results that occur from the combinations. Anger is unpredictable.

Even so, consider the implications of combining two or more toxic emotions. Just as certain chemicals explode or react when combined, anger is very often a catalyst for intensely negative behavior. 

Anger also tends to take on different forms depending on time, space, and situation. Consider these combinations:

Anger + Urgency = Panic

Anger + Confinement = Explosive Behavior

Anger + Constraint = Tantrum

Anger + Grief = Cloudy Thinking

Anger + Too Many Options = Poor Decision Making

Why should we be concerned with other factors associated with anger? Because of its volatility. What makes a person angry usually isn’t consistent over time. Nor does anger in a relationship always stem from the same set of circumstances or follow the same behavioral patterns. 

If you’re unable to identify another factor associated with anger, very often you can deal with a situation in a way that diffuses or lessens it. For example, if you realize that your anger is caused by stress, addressing that specific issue either personally or professionally will make a big difference. People who are continually stressed out are wise to learn time-management skills and anger-management techniques. In today’s world, it’s easy to take on too many obligations in too short a time frame and with too high a level of expectation.

Recognize that the root causes and effects of anger aren’t always straightforward. In your attempts to get to the primary cause of an anger problem, you may find yourself dealing with a number of issues. But that’s okay. Address each of them as they come, and don’t stop dealing with them. As you persevere, God will give you the victory!