The Preparation: 7-Day Devotional for the Soon-to-Be Wife

Scriptures: Proverbs 10:21, Proverbs 18:21

Lipstick: Controlling Your Words

I’m not sure if you’ve ever been asked the question: “What is the one make-up item you cannot go without?” If you would have asked me this question in my teens, I would have said eyeliner without hesitation. Now that I’m a more “seasoned” adult, my answer would be a smudge-proof liquid lipstick, specifically a classic, bold red or a simple, everyday nude. I’m sure most would agree that a smudge-proof liquid lipstick is probably the best invention ever because there’s nothing cute about walking around with lipstick on the side of your mouth or on your teeth. I remember my matron of honor asked me several times throughout my wedding day if I needed to reapply my liquid lipstick. Surprisingly, my lips stayed photo ready all day long with no extra application needed. In today’s devotional, I want to give you your lipstick which symbolizes your words.

Proverbs 10:21a (NIV) says,

“The lips of the righteous nourish many…”

Proverbs 18:21 (NKJV) says,

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit.”

From the scriptures above, lips and tongues represent our words. Proverbs has many scriptures on how it is important to be wise when it comes to what we choose to say. People who obey God and live by His commands will use their words to feed or encourage others by lifting them up. As a woman and soon-to-be wife, it is important to learn to control your words even when you are angry or upset with your spouse. It’s kind of like smudge-proof lipstick – it is controlled and stays on until you are ready to wipe it off with makeup remover, whereas regular lipstick can make a mess and stain things it comes in contact with. Our harsh words can cause a “stain” or wound on the people we cast them on. We have the power to speak life or death into our husbands with our tongues. It is more beneficial for our marriage and pleasing to God if we are gracious with our words in order to build up our homes. So, let’s make the conscious decision to speak life and to praise God every day like a nude lipstick. Additionally, let’s use our words to be bold in prayer as we intercede on behalf of our loved ones and war against the enemy, just like a bold red lipstick.

Prayer

Heavenly Father, thank You for giving me the ability to have power in my words. I repent for the times when I have used my words to tear down instead of build-up. I know it is not good to praise Your name in one breath and curse someone else in another. May You give me wisdom and self-control with my tongue as I enter into marriage. Help me to be gracious and never hesitate to repent when I have fallen short in this area. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Scriptures: Ephesians 6:10-18, Colossians 3:15

Shoes: Walking the Path of Peace

Can I fill you in on a little secret? I ordered my budget-friendly wedding shoes from overseas that took several weeks to get to me. By the time I finally received them, they ended up looking NOTHING like the pictures on the website. (You get what you pay for, right?) I didn’t have the time or the energy to try and find something else to wear. So, I decided to wear them anyway because you could barely see them under my dress. I really just wanted something flat and comfortable because I was going to be standing a lot. In today’s devotional, I want to give you your wedding shoes which symbolize peace.

Ephesians 6:15 (NLT) says,

“For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared.”

This scripture comes from the passage where it talks about putting on the full Armor of God to protect yourself from the enemy’s attacks. Just like in your ordinary Christian walk, Satan will definitely try to attack your marriage. He hates godly marriages that reflect Christ and His Bride, the Church. We are called to stand our ground and be prepared to fight the good fight. Since we are now at peace with God through what Jesus did on the Cross, we can now be at peace with others, including our spouse. It is our responsibility to create peace in our homes and in our marriages. Stand firm and withstand Satan’s many attempts to cause strife between you and your spouse. It’s Satan, not your spouse, that is the enemy. Let your marriage be a beacon of light that will reflect people back to Christ through sharing the Good News when people ask, “how are you and your husband able to live in such peace and unity?” So sis, don’t use your shoes to walk all over your husband but rather use them to crush the enemy’s head with your God-honoring marriage as you both walk in step as one.

Prayer

Father, thank You for giving me peace that is not like the world’s peace. I thank You for sending Your Son, Jesus, to die on the Cross so that I can be at peace with You and peace with others. Help me to realize who my true enemy is, Satan, and not my soon-to-be husband. Help us to stand firm in Your truth and walk in unity. May our marriage be a witness of the Good News and reflect the covenant You extend to all people who will call upon You. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Scriptures: Proverbs 31:10, Proverbs 31:30, Proverbs 12:4

Jewelry: Far Above Rubies

In many cultures, it is not uncommon for someone to give you jewelry on your wedding day. Maybe your mom passes down a family heirloom of diamond earrings or a gold necklace that was passed down to her by her mom. Maybe your soon-to-be husband gifts you a piece of jewelry to adorn you for the big day. I remember for my wedding, Damien surprised me with jewelry that had my birthstone: ruby earrings. (Any July babies in the house?!) In today’s devotional, I want to gift you jewelry with rubies as a symbol of your rarity and infallible worth.

Proverbs 31:10 (NKJV) says,

“Who can find a virtuous wife? For her worth is far above rubies.”

Back in biblical times, rubies were considered extremely precious because they were very rare. Likewise, a woman who was virtuous was even harder to find and much more valuable than rubies. The word virtuous in Hebrew is Chayil which is linked to words like strength, wealth, power, and even virtue. I’m sure you’ve heard of the Proverbs 31 woman and how she could do all these great things like obtain wealth, lead in various places, and care for her family and others even while waking up before the sun without a cup of coffee. Impressive! The reason why she could do all of those things boiled down to her fear of the Lord. Because she reverenced God, she lived with such high moral character and operated out of a different source of strength and wisdom. As a result, she was praised and excelled in everything she did. She knew her worth and where it came from. Sis, your worth comes from the same source as hers. Your worth is not based on your status of becoming a wife or even based on what you do. No, you had worth before the foundations of the Earth. Before you were born, God knew you and Christ died for you. This makes you priceless! Rubies and diamonds ain’t got nothing on you! So, remember that you are a woman of great worth as a Daughter of the King. You aren’t living for worth but living from it. Therefore, live your life in such an honorable and virtuous way. I have no doubt that your soon-to-be husband and legacy will praise you and call you blessed.

Prayer

Father, thank You for paying the highest price for me, making me immensely valuable. I know my worth is far above rubies and that I don’t have to seek value in my work, my relationship status, or even my looks. Help me to live a life that follows Your ways and decrees. Place Your laws in my heart and Your Word around my neck. May I walk in reverence of You all the days of my life as a virtuous woman who is a blessing to all those around me, including my soon-to-be husband. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Wedding Ring: A Love That Lasts

When Damien and I first got married, I initially declined a wedding ring because I didn’t want it to mess up the style of my engagement ring. I loved the simplicity and daintiness of it. However, a few months after our wedding, strangers would look at my ring and comment on how beautiful it was and then would proceed to ask me when the wedding was. After this scenario played out more times than I could count, I told Damien that I now wanted a wedding ring. He proceeded to tell me he would get me one for our 1-year anniversary. A few weeks later, Damien woke up from his sleep and just blurted to me “God told me to buy you a ring for your birthday. He said you are a wife now and not a fiancé.” Granted, my birthday was just a week away and we didn’t really know how we were going to pay for one. You see, we were on our debt-free journey. Nonetheless, money randomly came in a day before my birthday and I got my wedding ring. Won’t He do it! In today’s devotional, I’m holding your wedding ring. This symbolizes covenant and agape love.

1 Corinthians 13:7 (NLT) says,

“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”

I want to make sure that you understand that marriage is a covenant, not a piece of paper that can be ripped up when someone no longer feels like doing it anymore. In order to help uphold the covenant, you are going to need agape love (and tons of forgiveness). Agape love is the highest form of love that is unconditional and makes sacrifices. It is not based on feelings but is a choice. This agape love never gives up on your marriage or on your spouse. It doesn’t lose faith in God to sustain your marriage. It hopes for the best in your spouse and in your marriage. Agape love endures through every fiery circumstance that is thrown it’s way. Just like how a gold wedding ring can withstand fire, I pray that your future marriage will be able to not only withstand the fire but also be purified by it. So when you look down at your ring, know that it is continuous. Though your covenant will end on this side of eternity when death does you and your spouse part, your covenant with God will be forever and ever. We can be sure of that because just like how God sent the money for Damien and I to get my wedding ring, He sent the price for this eternal covenant to be made by sending Jesus to die for our sins. He has sealed us with His Holy Spirit as assurance like an engagement ring until He returns. Now that’s some agape love!

Prayer

Father, thank You for the covenant You have made with me. I thank You that You will never leave me or forsake me. I pray that my soon-to-be husband and I will view marriage as a covenant. I pray we will choose to love each other not only with our feelings but also with our choices. I put my trust in You to sustain, protect, and bless our marriage. Help me to uphold and do my part in this future covenant marriage. May it glorify You until we reach the other side of eternity. In Jesus’ Name, I pray, Amen.

Scriptures: Mark 15:37-38, Romans 8:38-39, Matthew 19:6

Veil: The Unveiling of Love

I’m not sure whether you are planning to wear a veil or not. I was neutral in that regard. However, Damien really wanted me to wear one. He told me he always envisioned his bride covered with a veil as she was walking down the aisle and then him removing the veil for the first kiss as husband and wife. Out of respect and love for him, I decided to wear one. The only problem was it totally slipped my mind (and everyone else’s for that matter) that it needed to be ironed. Since I was already behind schedule and didn’t have time to get it steamed, I wore it wrinkled. I cringed inside but I knew how important it was for Damien (and I definitely didn’t want to waste the money). Everyone claimed they couldn’t notice the wrinkles that much. I’m not sure whether it was true or if they were trying to keep me from freaking out. Either way, it worked. In today’s devotional, I want to give you your (wrinkle-free) veil symbolizing intimacy and access.

Mark 15:37-38 (TPT) says,

“Just then Jesus passionately cried out with a loud voice and breathed his last. At that moment the veil in the Holy of Holies was torn in two from top to the bottom.”

This scripture is referring to the veil or curtain in the temple in Jerusalem. Only the High Priest could enter into the Holy of Holies (God’s presence) once a year. When Jesus died on the cross, that veil was torn, symbolizing that anyone can now have access to God’s presence. There is no longer a barrier between us and God. We don’t have to have someone else go into the Holy of Holies for us and we don’t have to wait once a year to enter. We can have intimacy with God through His Holy Spirit right now. When you make it to the altar and say, ‘I Do’, the veil (whether a physical veil or not) will be lifted up and now you and your husband will have full access to each other: mentally, physically, emotionally, sexually, etc. That’s if you allow it. This takes tons of vulnerability especially if you are used to putting up walls and masks to prevent people from hurting you or knowing the real you. When you get married that also means there will be a veil between you and others. No one else will have access to you sexually or will have as much access to you emotionally, etc. You will have to set up boundaries. Let no one come between the intimacy between you and your soon-to-be husband. The relationship between husband and wife is the most intimate earthly relationship which depicts the relationship between Jesus and The Church. There is nothing and no one who can separate us from our forever Bridegroom, Jesus, when He returns for the ultimate wedding day. The veil will be removed forever and we will live an intimate, happily ever after.

Prayer

Father, thank You for removing the veil between us. Thank You for calling me into a deeper and more intimate relationship with You. I repent of putting others before my relationship with You. Help me to remove any walls I have put up in my heart against You and my future spouse as well. I pray that You will bless my future union with my soon-to-be husband so that we can experience an intimate relationship with each other in marriage. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Scripture: 1 Corinthians 7:2-5

Garter: Tossing Sexual Shame

I’ve been to quite a few weddings where the retrieving of the garter right before the toss was a little uncomfortable to watch if you know what I mean. However, Damien and I chose to do the garter toss but kept it super PG for that matter. Most of our community knew we chose to wait to have sex with each other until marriage because we wanted to do things God’s way. In yesterday’s devotional, I gave you your veil symbolizing intimacy. In today’s devotional, I want to continue on that wavelength and give you your garter which symbolizes sex.

1 Corinthians 7:2-3 (NLT) says,

“But because there is so much sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife, and each woman should have her own husband. The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs.”

I’m not sure what your sexual past consists of, but most people’s (including my own) was full of brokenness and missing the mark on what God intended for it to be. Even here in scripture, we see sexual immorality as a common problem. This is nothing new, but it doesn’t mean that it isn’t serious. We live in a fallen world filled with all forms of sexual sin. I’ve heard from several preachers that sex is like fire. Inside a fireplace (in God’s design), it is beautiful. However, outside of a fireplace (in Satan’s perversion), it can destroy the entire house. But God is so gracious and kind that He wants to turn those ashes into beauty by redeeming and healing any sexual brokenness from our past or even present. That’s if we repent, allow Him to come in, and submit to His ways. God doesn’t want you to not enjoy sex. He just created it for marriage because He doesn’t want you to be burned. Sex is meant for so many good things like pleasure, oneness, and means for procreating.

Sometimes, even in marriage, we can still abuse sex. Sex, unfortunately, has been used as means to manipulate, control, or punish a spouse. It can also be a source of insecurity and shame, causing a feeling of inadequacy and a need to perform. Sis, don’t dangle sex in front of your future husband, and don’t allow certain controllable things to prevent you from being sexually active with your husband, regularly. Leave no room for the enemy to come into your marriage and cause temptation. Have a heart to serve your spouse, sexually. Rest in knowing that needs aren’t automatically understood but rather are communicated and learned. You will have your entire marriage to learn how to please each other in this area. So remove the pressure for performance. Toss any garter of shame or insecurity from your past or fear of your future in regards to sex within marriage, and surrender your sexuality to God. He wants to bless your sex life in marriage.

Prayer

Father, thank You for Your grace and mercy. I repent of any ways that I have sinned against You including the area of sex/lust. I pray that You will reveal and restore all brokenness within me. Help me to walk in purity, not just before marriage but also within marriage. Cleanse my thoughts, my heart, my speech, and my soul, spirit, and body. I give my body as a living and holy sacrifice to You. Help me to understand and trust Your purpose for sex within marriage. May I never use it as a weapon in marriage but treat it as the gift it is. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.

Scriptures: Luke 12:27-31, Genesis 22:14

Flowers: Bouquet of God’s Faithfulness

I am not one of those women who likes flowers. I’m more of a food person. I did, however, have a bouquet for my wedding though. Why? Because that’s just the tradition. I’m not quite sure of the story behind it, but everyone knows a bride has to have a bouquet of flowers as she walks down the aisle! Right? In today’s devotional, I want to hand you your beautiful bouquet of flowers. This symbolizes God’s faithfulness and care for you, His daughter.

Luke 12:27-28 (NLT) reads,

“Look at the lilies and how they grow. They don’t work or make their clothing, yet Solomon in all his glory was not dressed as beautifully as they are. And if God cares so wonderfully for flowers that are here today and thrown into the fire tomorrow, he will certainly care for you. Why do you have so little faith?”

When you hold your bouquet before you walk down the aisle, let this be a reminder of God’s faithfulness. Instead of worrying or being anxious about your future, put your faith and trust in God. You might not know what tomorrow, the next year, or ten years will hold, but you know Who holds you and your soon-to-be husband’s future. Because we know God’s track record for faithfulness, we can put our faith in Him. That’s definitely not a risky thing because He has kept you this far and He won’t leave you now. Even though you will be married and have a husband to look after you, you are still Daddy’s little girl and He will care for you both. There will be some sunny days and rainy days in your marriage. Just know, like flowers, you’ll need them both to grow. That’s what makes a marriage beautiful and full of splendor.

Prayer

Abba, Father. Thank You for Your continued faithfulness in my life. I give my fears and worries of my tomorrow to You. I trust You that You will take care of me and my future husband, even more so than the lilies of the field. We will lack no good thing. You are our Jehovah Jireh and we know that You will provide and sustain our lives despite what storms may come. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.