The Dark Cave: Wisdom for Dark Nights of the Soul

Scriptures: Psalms 28:1-9, Psalms 23:1-6

Feeling Alone and Forgotten by God

Faith is a dark night for man, but in this very way it gives him light. —John of the Cross 

A few years ago, the area where I live got hit with the worst winter storm in over one hundred years. We had single-digit temperatures and loads of snow and ice that took out our state’s power grid, leaving millions without heat for days. 

On the second day without power, when it got down to forty degrees in my house, I pulled out my flashlight and started digging deep into a dark storage closet for more warm clothes. I found all sorts of amazing winter gear I’d completely forgotten about because I never needed it where I live. 

Sitting there in the glow of that flashlight, I started thinking about the last few years. If I’m honest, I’ve felt like one of those jackets — forgotten in God’s closet for a while. I’ve been patiently waiting for Him to use me in a big way, but in the meantime, time is ticking away and I’m not getting any younger here. I kind of wonder if one day He’ll flip the light on, look in the closet, and go “Oh, hey, Joël! You’re still in here? Sorry, bro. I forgot about you!” 

If we’re honest, I think we all come to a place in our spiritual walk when we feel a little alone. We all wonder if God set us aside for a season and then completely forgot we were there. Do you see me down here, God?

I’m convinced that these times of feeling forgotten or abandoned – times when God seems silent or cold—are all part of a pattern in God’s work in our lives. He isn’t doing it to be mean, it’s actually part of the process of making you into who He knows you can be. 

In my book, Connecting the Dots: What God is Doing When Life Doesn’t Make Sense, I talk about how God is always at work in our lives, but most of the time we can’t see it or understand it. It’s only further down the road of life that we can look back and see that His hand was guiding us. 

The Apostle Paul makes a pretty confident proclamation when he says, “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” (Romans 8:28) As followers of Christ, we can be confident that in every season of life — even if we don’t understand exactly what He’s doing – God is working all things for his purposes. Which means God is leading you right now, right in the middle of the silence. 

And God seems to have a very specific pattern to the way He leads us. 

In Psalm 23, the psalmist said our Shepherd leads us in “paths of righteousness.” The Hebrew word used for path (magol) has a complex interpretation that means something closer to paths made of circles. Sheep tend to struggle to make it straight up a hill, so a shepherd leads them gently in circular paths—like a spiral—up the hill. 

I’m convinced that God’s work in our lives tends to look more like an ever-widening circle than a straight line. It’s pretty common to find ourselves circling back to time frames, places, and experiences and thinking, this again? But each time we come back around we look different and God looks different. 

I also believe that there are some really specific stages He takes us through each time around the circle. One of those stages is where He gets really quiet as He leads. It’s all part of the process. In this devotional, I want to look at what I call the Dark Cave and others have called Dark Nights of the Soul or dry seasons. My goal is to help you see that God is still with you and leading you even in these challenging times of spiritual dryness and loneliness. 

I want to help you see that it’s all part of the process that God is taking you through, a process that looks something like the pattern below (which I’ll talk more about as we go). 

So for today, I want to ask you to consider something. Are you feeling alone or abandoned by God right now? If so, is it possible that God’s silence might not be a sign of disapproval, but rather of His confidence in you? Is it possible, this season is part of a process He is working in you to sanctify you and conform you more to His image? I believe it is. 

Pray and express your feelings to the Lord today. Be honest. He can handle it. Then let’s move forward and look at how we can trust God is with us even in the Dark Cave.

Scriptures: John 6:66-69, Proverbs 24:10

Nowhere Else to Go

When Jesus was on the earth, He said and did some things that were really confusing to his followers. At one point, Jesus said, “Whoever feeds on my flesh and drinks my blood abides in me, and I in him.” (John 6:56) To his Jewish followers, who took him literally, they must have thought He was talking about cannibalism. For obvious reasons, many started to leave. 

Jesus turns to Peter and asks if he is going to leave too. Peter essentially indicates that he has no idea what Jesus is talking about, but he knows He is the Messiah so he can’t leave Him. “Where else will I go?” 

If you’ve been walking with Jesus for a while, there’s a good chance you can relate to Peter. God may confuse and frustrate us sometimes, but we’ve seen too much of His goodness to just abandon the journey. But sitting in the discomfort of those seasons of God’s mystery can be really… well, dark. 

St. John of the Cross, a Spanish monk, described this experience we all face as “the Dark Night of the Soul.” It can go by all sorts of names: a desert experience, spiritual loneliness, a dry season, feeling abandoned by God. No matter what you call it, it’s a horrible feeling. It’s a time when God feels distant, maybe even cold. It brings some intense emotions to the surface as we wrestle with our beliefs and faith. 

There’s a story about Teresa of Avila complaining to God in prayer about her trials and God’s seemed absence. In response to her complaints, God replied, “Do not complain, daughter, for it is ever thus that I treat My friends.” 

Teresa replied: “Ah, Lord, it is also on that account that Thou hast so few!” She basically says, “If this is how you treat Your friends, no wonder You have so few of them!” 

It may feel a little irreverent to say it, but if you’ve followed Christ for a while, you’ve probably been disappointed and disillusioned with Him. You may even have thought He wasn’t very godly at times—leaving you feeling abandoned and betrayed. We call out to him, but He doesn’t answer—at least not in the way we hoped He would. Doubts start to creep in. You start to wonder if this walk of faith is even worth it. 

Periods of silence in our walk with God are normal. It’s part of the journey. If you haven’t felt a dark night of separation or confusion with God, there’s a good chance the God you’ve been following is a god you created in your image. Because the true God is full of mystery. The more we know Him, the more we realize just how little we know or understand His ways. 

Dark Nights of the Soul aren’t punishment. They’re part of the process. When we understand the importance of the Dark Night of the Soul in the circular pattern of God’s work, it can help us get the most from the season. 

Dark Nights tend to come right at the end of a series of challenges and struggles (I prefer to call them the adventure, like in the chart below). In all the stories and movies we love the hero has to face a final battle alone. They emerge as a different, stronger person. 

You don’t get spiritually strong when there’s sunshine and unicorns and angels bringing good tidings of great joy all around you. You get spiritually strong when you’re faced with doubt and uncertainty and choose to hold onto truth that is deep inside of you. That’s faith. Faith is holding on to truth even when it seems like the truth isn’t true. 

Holding to faith in God’s goodness even in the Dark Cave is like a test before the next level. In the words of A. W. Tozer: “Are you willing to take the test? If you pass, you can expect to be elevated to a new level in the Kingdom. For He brings us through these tests as preparation for greater use in the Kingdom. You must pass the test first.” 

When we take a test in school, it has questions and problems that we have to prove we can work through using the truth we’ve internalized on the journey up to this point. Tests reveal whether you really know the material without the teacher feeding you the answers. During a test, the teacher sits in the corner quietly as you prove that you really know the material you’ve been learning. The teacher doesn’t feed you answers. That defeats the purpose. 

What if God’s silence in the Dark Cave moments of testing isn’t punishment? What if it’s a sign of His confidence? He believes you’re prepared and ready for the next level. If you start to see God’s silence as His confidence that you’re able to pass the test in front of you, it could lead to a whole new perspective in that silence. Like roots growing strong in the darkness of the soil, the Dark Cave of God’s silence can be your greatest catalyst for growth.

Today, I want you to consider something. If you really believed this time of silence was a sign of God’s confidence that you’ll pass the test, how would it change your perspective right now? 

Scripture: John 15:1-11

The Pruning

For years, I tried growing basil. But I couldn’t keep a plant alive for more than a few weeks. The plant would grow, I’d pick off a few leaves here and there, thinking that the less I took the stronger the plant would be, but then it would die. 

I started doing some research and found that if you want a massive harvest of basil, you have to constantly prune the tops of the stems as they grow. If you cut the tops to keep it from growing high, it will grow huge amounts of rich, thick leaves. It will also last a long, long time. 

Growing strong and healthy plants requires constant pruning. Our spiritual growth is no different. 

Jesus compares the spiritual growth process to the physical growth process when He says, “Every branch in me that does not bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit.” Basically, you are getting pruned one way or another. If you aren’t doing anything of value, you’re getting pruned. If you’re producing fruit, be prepared to get pruned so you can produce even more. Being a rich source of life requires pruning back anything that isn’t supporting the fruit you’re capable of producing. 

The Dark Night of the Soul can feel like being pruned. The spiritual support systems you depended on—feeling God’s presence, confidence, and certainty in what you believe—are all stripped away, and you enter the cave empty-handed and alone. 

When the pruning begins, it’s easy to focus on what God is using to prune you—His silence, feeling abandoned and alone, the person who is making your life miserable, the rejection, the pain—but we have to keep our perspective lifted. Keep your eyes off the pruning shears and focus on the One doing the pruning. 

Trust that whatever He’s cutting away in your life is something keeping you from being all you have the potential to be. If God cuts something or someone out of your life, you can be certain it was something that was holding you back. 

God’s pruning in the Dark Cave is a gift, even if it doesn’t feel like it at the time. 

His pruning can help us conquer our need for affirmation from others, our dependence on turn-by-turn instructions from on high, and getting our sense of worth from what we own, know, or do. The Master knows what will keep you from producing your greatest work. If you can keep your perspective on the big, circular picture, you can have faith that whatever God is stripping away in the cave is a gift to help you let go of anything that is limiting you from becoming all He knows you can be. 

And the truth is, more often than not, what is limiting us is nothing outside of us. What’s limiting us are the mindsets, attitudes, fears, and hurts inside us. This is where the journey goes internal. What’s outside of you becomes less important than what’s happening inside of you. In the Dark Cave, we tend to realize that the true struggle is within us — it’s a deep work. 

When we open ourselves to God’s work deep inside us we can be confident that he will transform us more and more into His image. 

Today, I want to ask you: What is God pruning or cutting out of your life right now? Express your feelings to God about that pruning.

Scriptures: Job 42:1-6, Matthew 5:1-11

The Victory of Surrender

The book of Job is most likely one of the oldest books of the Bible. Which I think is quite telling, because Job is the story of man’s relationship to God’s mysterious and sometimes painful ways. Humans have been confounded by God’s ways since the beginning of time. Job goes through a truly Dark Cave where he loses pretty much everything he has worked for up to that point. His family. His wealth. His health. 

His friends come to console him. They offer all sorts of explanations for his dark night and God’s silence. Some say it’s hidden sin. Others say it’s fate. Some say it’s random. Job is bewildered. He was serving God to the best of his ability and then all these horrible things happened to him. His faith seems to be shaken. He starts asking what he did wrong. 

About halfway through the book, God shows up and starts talking (Job 38:1-18). But in chapter after chapter of God’s response, He doesn’t offer any real answers to Job’s questions. He just starts firing off questions—like a teacher does with a test. It’s all one-sided. God doesn’t seem bothered by Job’s questions, but He does rebuke Job’s friends for their simplistic answers to the situation. 

In the end, Job humbly acknowledges, “I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know. Hear, and I will speak; I will question you, and you make it known to me. I had heard of you by the hearing of the ear, but now my eye sees you.”(Job 42:1-6) 

Job’s moment of clarity and comfort comes when he acknowledges his limited understanding of the bigger picture. In the words of G. K. Chesterton, “Indeed the book of Job avowedly only answers mystery with mystery. Job is comforted with riddles; but he is comforted.” Oftentimes, peace comes not with clarity but with embracing mystery. 

This seems to be the pattern of most divine revelation. It comes when we feel least certain. Revelation comes when we find contentment with mystery. And that’s the victory in the cave. Emerging victorious from your decisive battle in the cave will often feel more like an act of surrender than of victory. That’s the strange paradox of the Dark Cave. Winning victory over the enemy in the cave rarely looks like we thought it should. In fact, more often than not, it feels like a loss. Loss of capacity. Loss of autonomy. Loss of freedom. Loss of security. Loss of certainty. Even loss of life. That’s the paradox. 

Ultimate victory in the walk of faith looks a lot like surrender. 

Every time we surrender more of our life to God’s plan and purpose, we win greater victory. Jesus surrendered to His Father’s will and won the victory. The same is true for us. Our surrender to His plan is where we find meaning and purpose. When we feel defeated by the mystery of God and surrender to that mystery, letting Him lead us wherever he sees fit, there’s peace. This is also when we actually start to have something to offer the world. 

The Beatitudes indicate that blessing is reserved for those who are in a position of loss and surrender. Blessed are the poor in spirit, those who mourn, the meek, those who are hungry and thirsty. (Matthew 5:1-11) Surrendering to God’s will and ways is the ultimate victory. 

You aren’t surrendering your personality or who you are at your core. God made you exactly who you are for His purposes. He likes how He made you. He just wants you to become all He made you to be. The goal of surrender is transformation into His glorious image. Surrender is allowing Him to use all of you—your personality, your talents, and even your pain—for His purposes. 

I tend to believe it’s not even a matter of giving up your will, as much as it is submitting your will to God’s will. (Completely letting go of your own will would make you no longer human—you’d be a mind-numb robot.) We don’t give up our will. We willingly surrender it to God’s will. Like Jesus, we say, “Not my will, but Your will be done.” In that act of submission, we find the victory. 

The victory in the dark cave may feel like death of part of who we are. But in that death, we actually find total freedom and victory. Death, then resurrection. That’s the pattern. Before we can be resurrected to something new and glorious, first we must die to our will and ways and let Christ’s life live through us. We must die to our obsession with understanding and trust God is working all things for His glory and our good. 

Today, I want to encourage you to trust God with your Dark Cave season. Surrender your need to control the outcomes. Surrender your need for clarity. Take a deep breath and surrender to Him saying, “Not my will, but your will be done.”

Scriptures: 2 Corinthians 3:18, Romans 8:28

The Message from the Cave

In the book Connecting the Dots, I lay out the circular pattern of how God works in each season of life. (below) Each season has a Dark Cave or Dark Night that, if we’ll hold onto faith, we eventually emerge from a with a new perspective on God and ourselves. Our experience in that season is something God wants to use to give us a mission and a message. 

But the message God is preparing you to share requires depth and strength. You can’t lead people somewhere you haven’t been. As Henri Nouwen put it, “The great illusion of leadership is to think that man can be led out of the desert by someone who has never been there.” In our desert season, our Dark Cave, we face off with what we’d rather avoid. We endure what feels like a season of silence from God. Often there is something we’re required to surrender. When we surrender, we win the battle. We deepen our message.

When you get through the Dark Night of the Soul, you’ll probably feel like half the person you used to be. You may feel like you know less than you knew before the struggle. You won’t feel quite as certain about some things anymore. But that’s okay. You’ll be more comfortable with not knowing, and you’ll also become free from illusions and fear and your determination that things need to be a certain way. When you say, like Jesus, “Not my will, but Your will be done,” (Luke 22:42) you will find freedom and ultimately a new perspective. It may even feel like a rebirth. A new you.

If you’re in a season where God seems silent or absent, know this: He didn’t bring you this far to abandon you. He is still with you, even if He seems silent. Trust He’s still working and keep moving forward knowing He’s working all things together for your good – even if you can’t see it or understand it now. Trust that you, “are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.” (2 Corinthians 3:18) Brighter days are ahead. You will emerge from the cave. And on the other side, you’ll have a deeper and stronger faith. 

I pray this devotional has encouraged you to press on during the Dark Cave stage of your walk of faith.