You’ve been praying to meet your future husband and get married. As friends get married around you, how do you trust God when your biggest dream goes unfulfilled? And what does waiting for a spouse in this hookup culture look like? In this devotional, learn how to trust God as you navigate singleness and dating and how to wait on God’s timing for marriage when you feel like giving up.
Erin Elise Kiu
Day 1
Scriptures: Exodus 32:1-8, Psalms 106:21, Psalms 105:4-5
The Power of Remembering
As you pray for a husband, have you ever lost faith that God will answer your prayers?
I had liked the same guy at church for an entire year. After spending hours in prayer, asking God if Jeff was the one, my trust in God crumbled.
Jeff hadn’t asked me out, and God hadn’t confirmed if he was my future husband. How could I trust God when he wasn’t answering my prayers?
If you’re struggling to trust God, you aren’t alone.
In Exodus 32, the Israelites stopped trusting God after Moses delayed coming down the mountain. God performed several miracles to save them from the Egyptians, but the Israelites complained and doubted whether God was really with them.
In Psalm 106, the Bible tells us the Israelites stopped trusting God because they forgot the works God had already done.
Sometimes, we get so caught up in what God isn’t doing in our lives that we forget about what God has already done.
We doubt or believe lies that God has forgotten about us, or that he doesn’t have our best interest at heart. If we’re not careful, we can forget who God is and put our trust in something else.
How can you continue to trust God despite waiting for your prayers to be answered?
When you remember what God has done in your life and when you remember who God is, you’ll be able to trust God with your unanswered prayers.
Whenever I doubted whether God could bring me a husband, I reminded myself that if God can control the oceans, then he can bring me my husband. If God answered my prayers in other areas of my life, he could answer my prayer for a spouse too.
As you wait on God to grant the desires of your heart for marriage, remember all he has already done in your life.
Reflect
How has God been moving in your life? What prayers has he already answered?
What miracles has God performed for others that give you hope that God can answer your prayers?
Prayer
God, thank you for all the prayers you’ve already answered in my life. You are the same God who performed all those miracles back then, and I believe you can bring me and my future husband together. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Day 2
Scriptures: Psalms 13:1-6, Galatians 6:9, Habakkuk 2:3
Giving Up Is Not an Option
When the guy I liked for a year hadn’t asked me out, I almost gave up believing Jeff could be my husband.
“I can’t do this anymore, God.” The tears fell as I prayed. “I don’t want to like him if he’s not the one.”
How do you wait and trust God’s timing when you’re sick of waiting?
God shows us how to wait and not give up through David’s story in the Bible.
God chose David to become the next King of Israel, but Bible scholars estimate nearly fifteen years went by before David took the throne.
Can you imagine how many times David questioned whether God had made a mistake? I wouldn’t have blamed David if he gave up, especially after hiding out in caves when King Saul wanted to kill him.
David cried out to God in the waiting and surrendered his heart in anguish. David remembered God’s promise—he was to become the next King of Israel—and he refused to give up until God fulfilled his promise.
Through David’s story, God not only teaches us the power of remembering his promises, but that waiting is part of the process.
God never tells us we won’t have to wait.
We live in a fast-paced, Amazon-prime-two-day-shipping world where we expect our hopes and dreams to be fulfilled overnight. But just because things happen instantly on Instagram doesn’t mean God works this way.
God can answer our prayers overnight, but he uses seasons of waiting to build our faith and to prepare us for what’s ahead.
King David wasn’t ready to become king when Samuel anointed him. Rather, David’s season of waiting prepared him to fulfill his calling.
A few months after I almost gave up on Jeff, he started pursuing me. We got married nine months after our first date.
When you’re tempted to give up on marriage, remember that waiting is part of God’s process.
Remember the promises God has spoken over your life, and believe God is using this waiting season for good.
Reflect
What promises has God spoken over your life as it relates to marriage?
How can you renew your faith when you’re tempted to give up?
Prayer
God, I trust you in this waiting season. Thank you for giving me strength when I’m tempted to give up. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Day 3
Scriptures: Isaiah 55:8-9, Ephesians 3:20
Better Than You Could Understand
I tried to be optimistic about the plans God had for me, but I couldn’t ignore the pain in my heart.
Being single at thirty wasn’t part of the plan.
Why was I still single? And why was God taking so long to bring me a husband?
If you’ve been single for a while, you ‘ve probably asked God the same questions.
Maybe you’ve been praying for your future husband for years, or maybe things didn’t work out with the guy you thought was the one.
When you’re tempted to doubt whether God has a plan—and a husband—for you, remember God’s plans are better than you could understand.
God’s ways are not your ways, and his timing won’t always coincide with your timeline.
Instead of wondering why you’re still single, or why God is taking so long, think of all the ways God could be moving to bring you and your future husband together.
When my husband started praying for his future wife, I was living in the hookup culture of the world across the country from my husband.
But God had a plan.
God had softened my heart and awakened my desire to know Jesus. God brought me to San Diego, where I eventually surrendered my life to Christ and met my husband at church.
When I look back at all those nights I cried myself to sleep, I would have told myself that God had a plan.
He was moving even when I didn’t see it, and he was orchestrating me and my husband to meet.
If you’re struggling to understand why you aren’t married yet, remember God’s plans are better than you could understand.
You can’t even imagine how God is preparing you and your future husband for marriage in this season.
What if your future husband doesn’t know Jesus yet? What if he needs to be healed or set free from his past? Or what if he hasn’t moved to your city?
Reflect
How is God preparing your heart for marriage in this season?
What have you accomplished as a single woman for God’s kingdom?
Prayer
God, I don’t know why I’m still single, but I trust you. Your ways are higher than my ways, and you have a plan to bring me and my future husband together in your perfect timing. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Day 4
Scriptures: Galatians 5:16-25, Psalms 37:4, Philippians 2:13
Desires of the Heart
When I first liked my husband, Jeff, I wasn’t sure if my desires were from God.
I was used to worldly guys who didn’t treat me with respect, so I wasn’t sure if I liked Jeff because he was one of the first Christian guys I met.
As you pray in faith for your future husband, how do you know if a desire for someone is from God?
Some Christians argue God will grant the desires on our hearts because he’s a good heavenly Father. Others argue God isn’t a magic genie who will grant whatever we ask for. And some claim if they have a desire to do something, then it must be from God.
But not every desire we have is from God.
What our body wants will often differ from what the Spirit wants.
How many guys have you liked where you thought they were the one? But then you realized they were definitely not the man God had for you.
When we surrender our desires to God and take delight in him, he promises to give us his desires for our life and grant the desires on our hearts.
As you delight in the Lord, remember that God wants us to come to him out of love, not just when we want something.
As I prayed over my desires for Jeff, I asked God to take away these desires if they weren’t from him. I asked God to give me his desires for my life, and I surrendered my desires for Jeff to God.
As you surrender your desire for marriage, it’s important to be willing to give up your desires, no matter what God says.
Surrendering means letting God give you his desires for your life, instead of asking God to bless the desires you already have.
And surrender is asking God to close the doors that need to be closed.
Reflect
Have you ever had a desire you knew wasn’t from God?
If you like someone, are you willing to let him go if God says he’s not the one?
Prayer
God, I surrender my desire for marriage to you. Thank you for aligning my desires with the desires you have for my life. If a desire is not from you, make it clear. In Jesus’ name, amen.
Day 5
Scriptures: Genesis 24:1-16, Ruth 2:1-9, Proverbs 16:9
God Writes the Best Love Stories
Does it ever feel like finding a husband is impossible?
For most of my twenties, I tried meeting men at bars, work, and on dating apps. But I didn’t meet my husband.
Finding a spouse seemed impossible, so I pursued God in hopes he could help me.
God put it on my heart to move to San Diego from Chicago, and I wondered if moving across the country was God’s plan to meet my husband.
I surrendered control of my love story to God and studied love stories in the Bible.
In Genesis 24, Abraham asked his servant to go to his homeland to find a wife for his son, Isaac. The servant couldn’t accomplish this task without God’s help, so he prayed God would make his journey a success.
As the servant approached a well, Rebekah appeared before he finished praying. Rebekah became Isaac’s wife, and Isaac loved her deeply.
God positioned Isaac and Rebekah to meet in an unlikely way during an unlikely time. They didn’t have dating apps or social media to find a spouse. And they didn’t live in the same city.
Isaac and Rebekah’s story is only one example of how God orchestrated people to meet in the Bible. God also brought Ruth and Boaz together by working in the same field.
If God positioned these couples to meet back then, what makes you think he can’t position you to meet your future husband?
God had orchestrated things for years for me and my husband to meet at the same church on the same volunteer team.
As you pray about where you’ll meet your husband, trust God to guide you.
God knows exactly when and where you’ll meet. He is the author of the best love stories, and he will direct your steps to meet your spouse.
Reflect
How can you surrender control of your love story to God?
What has God put on your heart to pursue to meet more single men?
Prayer
God, thank you for writing my love story. I believe you are positioning me and my future husband to meet. In Jesus’ name, amen.