Young Adults + Our Stories

Scriptures: 1 Timothy 4:12, Isaiah 40:29-31, Proverbs 3:5-6, 2 Corinthians 1:3-5

Young Adults Speak

Hi there! My name is Dr. Sandi Van Lieu, but around young adult men and women, I’m just known as Sandi.

For more than twenty years, I’ve been a college professor and writer, and I absolutely love living alongside young adults. They have struggles I can relate to, and their passion and laughter bring me much joy.

I’ve recently noticed a rising up among young adults around the country. Many express they’re tired of things that drain or fail to fill them, like technology, people they thought were friends, culture, or even parts of church/religion. They want to learn more about Jesus and grow in their faith. Most are in their 20s and 30s and unmarried, so they’re navigating education, living independently, family situations, and relationships.

I have the honor of serving at a church in Phoenix as a young adult small group leader, and in one year, I watched young men and women turn their lives around. I witnessed baptisms, negative romantic relationships end or positive-God-centered relationships start, and fires lit under some who quickly spread it to their friends. I’ve seen those who grew up in very difficult circumstances or those who grew up indifferent to faith come to know Jesus and desire the scriptures and genuine community and friendships.

As I set out to write a new devotional for young adults, I wanted to address various topics, but something wasn’t quite right. After praying and talking to my small group, I decided that instead of writing from my perspective or stories, I would write from theirs.

I love story-telling and listening to people talk about their lives, so I thoroughly enjoyed hearing the stories you’ll read over these next six days. I realize devotionals are short; sometimes, readers may not feel they can relate. However, I encourage you to find a way to connect — even if it causes you to think about something for a friend or you choose to do a deeper dive into the scriptures — there is much to be found in each one.

One of the things that impresses me about the young adults I know is how they desire to talk to someone older than them. Even at my age, I still appreciate it when women spiritually invest in me. I encourage you to find someone older who you trust to mentor you or be there for you. You’ll find wisdom to help you on this journey.

You likely have your own story; if you want to share it with me, my website link is on my Plan Info page, and it would be an honor to hear from you.

Life is tough, but know that many others understand what you’re going through. God is a present refuge for you, and He loves you.

You’re in my prayers and the prayers of the young adults found in these pages.

Scriptures: Psalms 68:5, Psalms 34:17-18, Psalms 10:14, Romans 8:15-17

When Family Hurts Us: Veronika’s Story

I was born in Ukraine and had a very difficult childhood. My father left when I was young, and my mom made it clear that I reminded her of him and, therefore, disliked me as well. My mom’s pain was constantly put on me; she yelled, called me names, and physically abused me.

As I grew, I often questioned myself, wondering what I did wrong or what was wrong with me. I felt worthless, unloved, resentful, and lonely, and I wanted to fix myself so she would love me. As a young adult, I didn’t know what to do to fill this hole.

When I was nineteen, the war in Ukraine began, and my mom and I moved to America. However, she soon stopped communicating with me, and I was broken. I didn’t understand how a parent could do this.

I started attending church, praying, seeking healing and guidance, and asking God to bring people into my life, such as friends. I met a woman who served as a young adult leader, and she became my mentor. I grew in my faith and learned I needed to work on forgiving my family—not because they deserved it, but for me; I needed to forgive to heal and move forward because God asked me to since he forgave me.

Eventually, I was able to pray for my mom that someday she would heal her relationship with God and me. That still hasn’t happened, but I thank God for what he’s done in my life and for showing me my purpose. It’s clear that when I pray with an open heart, God gives me hope and even more than I prayed for.

It’s extremely difficult to be a child without loving parents, but I know God loves me and is my father. It’s taken time, and I’m still on this journey, but I’ve learned I’m not alone.

You’re not alone, either. Know that every word and action done to you is not because of you. Each person is responsible for their actions. Pray for God to fill you with his love and peace. Ask him to bring positive, Godly people into your life.

If you feel unloved because of how others have treated you — or for any reason — you’re not alone. I understand, and so do many others. God made you wonderfully, he’s with you always, and you are worthy.

Pray Over Your Story

Dear God, Please continue to heal me from the family hurt in my life. Help me understand how much you love me and how worthy I am. I pray you’ll bring Godly people into my life who will surround me and provide a community. Give me wisdom and help me forgive my family for the hurt they inflicted so that I can move forward. Thank you for your promise that you will never leave me and that you have a purpose for my life.

Scriptures: 1 Peter 5:7, 2 Timothy 1:7, Philippians 4:6-7, Matthew 6:25-28

Anxiety is Strong, but God’s Goodness is Stronger: Isabelle’s Story

I’ve struggled with anxiety all my life — through my parent’s divorce, my dad’s addiction, my sister’s addiction, high school, college, and into young adulthood. I suffered from panic attacks and anxious thinking for as long as I can remember. My mind became flooded with endless scenarios of what could happen… What if this happened?…

The anxious thoughts were fixated on my career, relationships, and character. These thoughts combined with physical symptoms of fatigue, nausea, weight loss, dizziness, palpitations, light-headedness, and so much more. It held me hostage in my dark bedroom to ruminate and feel as though I would never move forward. I actually believed God was giving me anxiety to tell me something. I believed he was inflicting this pain as a mental and physical torment to communicate with me and guide me through life.

It wasn’t until I came to truly know Jesus that I realized this was, in fact, not from God but from the enemy. The enemy was attacking my mind and giving me anxiety. The enemy does this as a strategic tactic to distract us from the truth of our God. If the enemy can get us focused on the future, on scenarios that have not and may never happen, then he can strip us away from the present.

This tactic takes our focus off Jesus so we don’t feel the peace, love, and hope he gives us right now. Jesus is always with us, ready to give us peace and clarity. Not once, through my bouts of anxiety, did Jesus ever leave my side. I look back on the times I was stuck and couldn’t leave my room, and I see Jesus sitting next to me, holding my hand, wiping away my tears, and whispering to me the truths of his love and reminders that he is for me, never against me. Just as he is for you, with you, loves you, and patiently waits for you to bring all your fears to him in faith that he is in control and will never lead you astray.

Now, when I have panic attacks or unexpected bouts of anxiety, I do a couple of things. I pray and give all my worries over to God. Wherever I am, I stop and pray. Prayer walks with my dog have been of great benefit. I pray for God’s peace, wisdom, and presence over my situation. But when I can’t bring myself to pray, I ask others to pray for me. Often, I’ve discovered they will reach out to other people and request prayers for me. I read the Bible, meditate on it, and memorize verses that bring me peace and remind me of God’s goodness. Finally, I talk to someone about it. I call a friend, a leader, family — someone who has a deep relationship with Christ, and I’ll talk to them about it.

Pray Over Your Story

Dear Heavenly Father, Thank you for your presence. Although my mind is in shambles, I know you’re with me, pouring your peace and love into my heart and spirit. Lord, shift my gaze from the troubles of the future and back onto you, who is present in the moment. May my gaze forever focus on you and my troubles melt away, for you’re in control. I pray for a peaceful mind, calm spirit, and joyful heart. In the name of Jesus, I pray, Amen.

Scriptures: Proverbs 27:17, Proverbs 17:17, Hebrews 10:24-25, Ecclesiastes 4:9-12

Being Vulnerable to Find Community: Caleb’s Story

During my freshman year of college, I felt lonely and disconnected. I wasn’t sure how to make friends. I was quiet, anxious, and out of my comfort zone.

My parents encouraged me to find a Christian group on campus, so I finally went. Being vulnerable was difficult; I felt sick to my stomach simply taking that step. The couple of groups I first tried weren’t a good fit, but my family encouraged me to keep trying.

Finally, during my sophomore year, I found a group I liked. The guys were initially quiet, but I took what I could spiritually from the discussions. Soon, the dynamics changed, and we talked more and started hanging out, playing sports, having lunch, and serving our city.

My acquaintances eventually became friends, and I enjoyed being with others and making those connections. Being part of a group helped me with my loneliness, challenged me, and encouraged me to grow spiritually.

During my junior year of college, I went through a period of time where I felt disconnected from God and like a lukewarm Christian. Getting back on track was heavy on my heart. I took a long social media break and looked for a second guy group to help me refocus and have an accountability factor. I finally found one, and I especially liked having older leaders with experience from whom I could gain wisdom.

Jesus himself spent time alone, but he also spent time with groups. He sent the disciples out in pairs. We’re meant to be together and share in community. During trials, the community is there to support you. Now, I try to help younger guys who are where I once was. Putting yourself out there is not easy, but it’s definitely worth it.

Pray Over Your Story

Dear God, There are areas in my life where I can use clarity, confidence, and community. Help me to take a step of faith and find a community where I can grow and make friends. Help me reach out to others and invite them into my community. Remind me of the importance of growing together spiritually, gaining wisdom, and encouraging others.

Scriptures: 1 Samuel 16:7, Proverbs 31:30, Ephesians 2:10, Psalms 139:1-18

Self-worth Found in Christ: Prescilla’s Story

From the time I was in middle school, I struggled with how I felt about my body. I was a bright and funny kid, but I was the “bigger girl,” and boys would tease me, kick me, and pull my hair. I had parents who were smaller and could eat whatever they wanted, but I couldn’t.

When I got a cell phone, I would scroll and see skinny girls and people with clear skin, and I felt terrible about myself. Guys would want to hang out, but I quickly learned they only wanted me for sexual purposes, and when I said no, I was teased by others.

Even though I was smart, I felt less than people smarter than me. My parents usually had me on a diet or in a sport, but no one asked me what I wanted or how I was feeling. In high school, a boy took advantage of me, which was difficult to process. I spiraled and went to a dark place where I was angry at God that this happened. I couldn’t see anything but sadness. I lived with gray-colored lenses, and I put on happy faces but felt sad all the time. I tried drugs and sex, but it led to fights with my parents, my grades slipping, and bad rumors about me. There were times when I no longer wanted to live.

I started attending youth groups simply to please my parents, but the more I learned about God, the more he provided. I began to feel better as I removed myself from those negative situations. I prayed, and God provided.

I started surrounding myself with faith-based people and had a friend who shared her story with me. It was a terrible story, yet she was the happiest person I knew because of God. I wanted that, so she took me under her wing and encouraged me to read the Bible. Once I did, it lifted me and made me stronger. I began attending worship nights, praying, and reading the scriptures, which helped me heal.

I went to college and was accepted into a nursing program. Positive things happened on my path, and I understood it was God. I was in now God’s plan, not the devil’s or my own. I understood that my low self-worth and the things people did to me were acts of others and not God himself — he made me perfect in his perfect way. If he loves us perfectly, we should accept ourselves. The Holy Spirit is in our hearts and helps us become stronger and love others.

I truly believe God forgives me, loves me, and has a beautiful plan for me. Our walk of faith isn’t easy, but God is always walking with us.

Pray Over Your Story

Dear God, Thank you so much for being there even when I’m in darkness. I’m struggling with feeling good about myself because of what the world defines as beautiful, having clothes and things, and the way I look. Help me to spend less time on my phone or in areas where the things of this world make me feel less than. Help me grow in my relationship with you so that I can know you made me perfect and your opinion is all that matters.

Scriptures: Galatians 6:2, 1 Corinthians 6:18-20, Matthew 5:27-28, Galatians 5:22-25

Pornography & Sexual Temptation: Tyler’s Story

When I became a teen, I started struggling with pornography. Everyone at school, especially my guy friends, acted like it wasn’t a big deal. They would share photos and joke around. Even though I rarely went to church, I still didn’t feel right about it. Each time I viewed it, I felt guilty.

After graduation, I made a community college basketball team and got to know the other players. I became friends with a guy who acted differently than the others. He was still fun to hang out with, but he wouldn’t join in on the jokes about girls and didn’t really cuss. He had a girlfriend and told us they weren’t having sex.

Eventually, he invited me to his church college group. People were friendly and not like I was expecting. We broke out into groups of just guys, and the leader talked about sexual temptation. He admitted he had been engaged in this lifestyle even though he was brought up in a strict Christian home.

He said that even from a secular perspective, pornography creates an addiction that can hurt your relationships with women and the way you view them. He also shared Bible verses about why God intends us to have pure thoughts and how we should confess what we’re going through to a leader we trust who will help us walk through it.

I met up to have coffee with this guy and share my problem. I felt shame, but he was kind. He told me more of his own story. He gave me resources and challenged me to read those and more scriptures. He gave examples of many people in the Bible who messed up, yet God forgave them.

The changes in my life didn’t happen overnight, but as I studied the science behind sexual struggles and addiction, I began to rewire my brain. I continued to meet with this college group leader. He encouraged me and prayed with me. I learned that some people in the church even went to professional counseling for help in this area.

Around this time, I met a girl in the college group, and we began dating. From the beginning, she made it clear what her physical boundaries were and that she wasn’t having sex until marriage. Her boldness and beliefs struck me. I liked her a lot — enough to know I would do everything to respect her. We’ve now been dating for a year, and while temptation still comes, we try to avoid those situations, we mostly hang out with people who are good influences, and we do a Bible app plan together. It’s been a hundred percent worth it, and now I get to talk to younger guys about how to work through these struggles.

Pray Over Your Story

Dear God, I’ve been struggling with this issue. Sometimes, I doubt and think it’s not a big deal since that’s what others around me do, or it’s simply too difficult to fight. Please help me grow in my relationship with you so that I can also grow in this area and resist temptation. Change my thoughts to pure thoughts. Bring a mentor or friend into my life that I can talk to. Thank you for forgiving me and loving me.

Scriptures: 2 Corinthians 1:3-5, John 14:15-18, Psalms 25:16-17, Psalms 73:23-26

No Longer Lonely: Caysea’s Story

My whole life was once wrapped in loneliness. My parents were addicts, and my dad left when I was young. During high school, I had to care for myself and support my mom. I immersed myself in school activities, sports, and academics. Peers and friends surrounded me, but at home, life was toxic and completely lonely.

When I was 17 years old, my mom kicked me out of my house. I lived in my car for a few months before a teacher and his family took me in. Suddenly, I was surrounded by adults and siblings who cared about and loved me. They became my example of kindness and love; I no longer felt as lonely.

I began to explore faith and ask a lot of questions. My high school best friend invited me to church, and I found God. I moved in with that friend and continued to grow. Within a year, I got a full-time job, leased my own apartment, and fully supported myself.

Eventually, I met a guy who became my boyfriend, and his family accepted me as if I were already a part of their family. At church, I found a small group of young adult women who I clicked with and became friends with.

Through all this, God was there for me and helped me feel less lonely. In addition, as I prayed for community, God brought people into my life. He’s shown me time and time again that he’s there for me to fill that place of loneliness and that he will continue to bring people into my life to be my family and friends.

A person can be surrounded by many family and friends yet still feel lonely inside. Or, a person can be like me, having no one and feeling lonely. God, though, is the only one who can fill that place in a person’s heart. For me, this happened through prayer, reading the Bible, and attending church. I also gained wisdom from my church small group, friends, and doing devotionals with my boyfriend. Loneliness occurs less often as I’m reminded of God’s immense love for me.

Pray Over Your Story

Dear God, I’ve been struggling with feeling lonely because of ______. Please fill this hole in my heart and take away the loneliness. I pray you’ll bring people into my life who can help give me community, surround me, and support me. Thank you for always being freely available to take the loneliness away.